I left my wireless keyboard for my laptop out on the deck. And it rained. Now she is pouting. Or dead. I think dead. I hate it when I kill technology, it's just such step backward. Now I have to use the laptop keys...ahhhh which is killing me.


I'm sitting out on the back deck over looking at my lawn, which is..ummm very tall. Our newest lawnmower doesn't work. It blows. It blows all the dirt and grass in your face. So, we are fighting with "Troy"..the lawnmower people. I should check back in my posts to see if I have already addressed this issue. But at the risk of repeating myself ... that mower is fucking nuts. Seriously, I have been mowing the back 40 with a little fucking electric lawnmower.

I can hear Gord coming home from the highway. He is driving his bro's Excalibur. I'ts powerful and loud.

And he just pulled in the driveway. I know the sounds. Just like a dog.

Even when we were dating, he used to come and pick me up with his motorcycle, and after he dropped me off at home and I went into my room, ... and if the wind was from the right direction I could hear his bike going home (4 mile ride) almost half way home.

Just sitting on the deck relaxing....thinking about the good ole days...

But I really need a stun gun for that fucking red squirrel that is absolutely nuts.

Gord just took off all his clothes...oops not all of them ... and came a joined me on the deck.

We are going to have a few drinks and some serious Taco Time.

Penny sends her love.

I think I will regret this post...but..what the hell

Got most of my "at home bookwork" done. Bills are all paid, plus those damn fricking Government taxes forms we have to fill out..one every month and the other every three months. Yikes, I barely have time to make a deposit...in the can that is. Gord does the real deposits at the bank thank goodness. If he sent me there with the cheques and stuff I would probably ask to use the facilities and flush it down.

I just hate reporting the taxes on our invoices. Provincial Sales Tax is due on the 20th. Like I actually have entered anything on the computer by then. And the GST is due every three months, and "like I have actually entered anything by then". I just don't have the time, especially in summer while working full time. There is the yard work, playing golf, tennis, river rafting, jumping on a plane to see a dear friend who is sick, playing with the dog, taking a little vacation to the Black Hills in Minnesota, blogging, facebooking, and finding the time to shave my legs.

I wish.

I have a lot of wishes.

I keep a old chicken "wishbone" in my purse. No, it doesn't stink, I dried it out.

It will one day serve it's purpose. I think it was my lucky chicken.

We shall see.

I was sad to hear today that Ted Kennedy died. As a Canadian you wouldn't think your Government in the US affects us, but it does. Personally, I don't give a shit if you are a Democrat or a Republican...apparently some do, but I don't.

I remember when I was about 18 years old and JFK died. I was devastated, (yes we in Canada were) ...because I thought he was someone who change the world and get things happening. I was working at a sewing factory at that time in my hometown 7 miles from the US border.

Hippy Chick and I were walking the long trek to the factory after coming home for lunch, when a friend picked us up and gave us a ride the rest of the way. When we got in the car, he said he had just heard that JFK had died. We were in shock. We cried. For a President that wasn't our own. A man we saw who would attempt to bring change. A change we wanted in Canada as well. And then the shit happened. Ahh the 60's/70's. And no one got it right after that. In the 70's we in Canada had a man who had somewhat the same vision his name was Pierre Trudeau. He was a Liberal. And he took us, especially young people like we were at the time to listen to him and his ideas. We did and we loved him. We followed him, and he did great things for our country. After he left, it was one boring one after the other. No hope, no getting you pumped up. No vision. I lost any interest in politics. Let all the assholes vote for the dumbnuts.

Presidents and Prime Ministers have to realize you must some how get us to that "happy place" again. A place where we can trust your judgement. And proceed with change.

So comes the end of the Kennedy Requiem.

Not any family is without it's fault's, as it was with the Kennedy's, they were human. The same was with our Prime Minister...lot's of shit went down with his wife. But ..it was what it was.

But we expect our leaders to be perfect. It will never happen.

But I know Ted Kennedy was a real advocate for health care reform in the US. I don't really know about his other causes but this one sticks out in my mind.

I read so many blogs where people can't go to the doctor if they aren't feeling well, because they don't have health insurance...or their insurance won't cover it...or something called co-pay (sorry I don't understand what that is exactly) is too expensive. I'm assuming it's a deductable...God! I just read a blog where a women who needs a hole in her heart fixed, but she can't get it done because she has pre-existing problems with seizures. I cannot imagine this. There is no one left out of our health care system...no one. Even the poorest of them all. We all sit in the same ER room when we are sick and we all get the same treatment
We, never have to worry if we have to sell our house in order to pay the doctors. We can have any illness in the world. We will never have a bill. We all take care of each other. The have and the have nots. It all works out in the end.

So....I know your new President is trying to get this plan going. Give the guy a chance. The peace of mind is so well worth it. Trust me. I just can't imagine having to worry about that. My big worry is going to the doctor in the first place... I have "white coat syndrome"...and it takes a 1/2 ton truck with a rope to drag me there...


I've probably said more that I started out to..... Look what happens when I keep my big trap shut too long.

Howdy

Man it's been awhile. I think the blogger police are going to take my license away. I had every intention of posting a "video" yesterday, and actually made two of them. I made a fool of myself two times and the camera didn't fricking work I was sweating my brains out in that helmet. Plus doing my magic tricks, which involved a lot of running. son.of.a.bitch. And the dog was barking her head off watching me run in and out the front door...doing my magic.

I cannot believe what I do for you.

Today I tried making a short video of the 4,500 weird birds in our trees, and...it worked just fine. I wonder which button I pressed yesterday? Whatever button it was, all that was recorded was some audio, with me swearing and a lot of clicking noises. The screen was black. So, if nothing else, I have had two rehearsals, so now the show should only get better, don't you think? Yeah rite.

SIL Sheila and I went Hippy Chicks house at her farm yesterday. Fortunately we choose the only day it hasn't rained this summer. She made us a nice lunch and then we wandered around her acreage and checked out all her new plants and stuff. We left with a fair amount of veggies.


Zoe...master of her domain.

Nice little whatchamacallit with Ivy growing over it.
She built the deck which is just in front of the gazebo from old wood from some of the out buildings around her farm/acreage. Plus carved out this lovely garden.
Gazebo, that looks out into the fields behind it. Lovely breezes. Fire pit to the right which I didn't get in the picture.
Lovely carriage full of begonias.
Hippychick on the left, making sure we don't take all her veggies. She frisked us before we left.
Yeah, like that would happen, you would need a 5 ton truck for that.
Time to get back in my truck and head back for civilization. Something on the right seems to be very interesting, even the dog is looking at it. I think a deer farted.

Give me a few days to get all my book work done at home, I will try to get back on track. I am so very tired.

My mama said there would be days like this

The rain...she is still relentless. It never freaking stops. But enough about the weather.

Oh, I guess that probably is my life right now. so bye. Okay, you talked me into writing a few more pointless words.

You probably don't want to hear about this spreadsheet I made at work today. It's sheer genius. If I do say so myself. Two other guys were working on it, and I nailed it just before it was time to go home for the day. I actually considered working overtime to work on it some more. I can't wait to go to work tomorrow and show dem young little farts my creation. They love to tease me because ...yes I could be their Grandmother, but sometimes a little life experience goes a long way. Unfortunately these youngsters feel they have to make a "pretty spreadsheet" with way to much crap in it....pretty don't cut it, useless crap doesn't cut it.. JUST THE FACTS ASSHOLES. That is my motto. What is the info we need? and what is the best way to get it without going all "Barbie."

So that's that.

Now what?

I know I haven't done my magic video yet. It's still in the works. If it ever quits raining on Friday night (my video making night) I will do it. My magic doesn't like rain.

I got my first text message on my cell phone on Sunday morning. It said: "hey you know where two can get any green?" Apparently they thought I was a drug dealer. Or they got the wrong number..heh. I couldn't resist texting back: "I have a whole backyard full of"green, come help yourself, just watch out for dog shit. If you feel the need to mow the green I would ever so grateful." ( I made it a little shorter than that, but I think I got the point across). I didn't get a response. I think they probably have changed their number by now. So funny, I bet they have little brown stains in their shorts. I have kept the number, and I think once a week I will text them and ask when they are coming over to mow the "green"... HA

Tomorrow at work, after I have entered all the info in my new spreadsheet, and have received nothing but accolades from my co-workers, I will call it a day and make a new template for blogger.

On another note:
I have been having problems with clearing out my home made wine. Problem is solved. Just put bleach in it. Just kidding.

I finally have solved the problem, but I still don't know why it didn't clear out with the last two batches. I have been online with all the other wino's out there and they couldn't help me. Most of these guys are a little to sophisticated for me, they really are into this stuff. I just want to make some wine that tastes good and doesn't take a year to make. A month is good. Finally I went to the wine store and they told me I had to put in something that's called Sparkleoid.. I really have no idea what it does, but I think it pushes the cloudy parts to the bottom. Then ... all is right with the world. Sparkie did the trick. I now have two vats clear and ready to go. All is well with the world. This should last for quite some time. Like tomorrow....I kid.

If it doesn't rain tomorrow, I will make my magic video. If it does, I will be under my desk sipping wine before it's time.

Summer time...and the living ain't easy..

So much to do, so little time. We went over the plans last night with Hippy Chick and it's looking good. There is still a lot of shit to do. I mean a lot of shit. I have to go over the plans again to make changes, because SIL and I are going out to her farm this weekend and she will need them. But, I can't make up my mind.

I cannot envision? stuff on paper. Truth be told, I feel like puking. I am a visual person, let me see the real shit and I will tell you whether I like it or not. But...drawings are for those that

1. are smarter than me
2. or like to see me puke

I started this with a vision of a country cottage type house. Yes, I have the front porch. That has been decided. But when it comes to the interior, I have chosen the exact opposite. I love clean wide open spaces...lots of windows...and it's contemporary. No fuss no muss. Very uncottage like. I can't seem to help myself. I now have to decide on the fireplace. This could be be what makes the house a cottage. I'm thinking a large Tyndall stone fireplace in the centre of all the windows that are looking out back to the forest.

ahh..halp.

It's still raining, but so what.

We are..finally in the secondary stages of planning our new house. I didn't want to talk about it much because I didn't want to jinx it. Hippy Chick is doing the final drawing of it this weekend, and once we approve it, we can start to get prices and start building in spring. (can't build here in winter) just so's you know. I am very excited. I will have a veranda...or a porch whatever... I always wanted a front porch/veranda. Plus I will have a island kitchen with a family room adjacent to it with a lot of huge windows overlooking a forest. Plus Hippy chick put in an area just off the kitchen for my computer and stuff. I'm a lucky little tramp.

It's going to be one hell of a project, and I am sure tears will be shed, but still...it's exciting.

Gord and I along with some friends are going out to the property in a few weeks and do a ribbon cutting ceremony. I need to find a silver spade to dig that first hole. And by the time we are finished with it I am sure one of us will use that same spade to bury the other. Building is stressful I hear.

But, at least having something to look forward to is a joy.

I am starting a new week with good thoughts. And if shit gets in the way, I still have a spade, even though it's not silver.

Woodstock baby

I checked out a few stores today and couldn't find it.

But, of course in Future Shop the music was so loud, I almost lost my balance. I went in there to look for a MP3 player and to buy the Woodstock DVD set.

Once I regained my balance a lady who was across a narrow isle from me, bent down and knocked me into a glass display of telephones with her big fat ass. She sort of said "excuse me" and kept on digging for some piece of crap on the bottom shelf. I was flapping around trying to get my footing and trying not to pull down the entire display of cordless telephones. She never gave me a second glance.

After I gathered up my dignity I approached an "associate" for the new Woodstock DVD, ...he didn't have a clue, but did direct me to an isle that contained DVD's...yeah I knew where they were, asshole. Anyway, I was in a hurry and I wanted to buy a MP3 player as well. I checked them out... I didn't have a clue what I was looking for. But, I knew I wanted a "touch screen" because I didn't want to fuck around with figuring shit out. Point and go. I picked out the perfect one. It wasn't too expensive, because I don't need anything high end, I just want to record pod casts with it and put some pictures in it. I don't listen to music that much other than on our system at home ...so it was cool.

Of course the guy tells me I need an I Pod...I don't think so. I told him I found the one I am looking for ..right here, ...see...the one in the cheap seats. He frowns at it. And says a number of customers have brought this baby back because the battery power on this model is low...or some dumbfuckingthing. And then he tried to redirect me to a higher end model which is about the size of your fingernail ...I swear that MP3 player was so small I could have fit it up my ass. Sure, if my only objective was to have music blaring out of my butt, that unit would have been my first choice, but as it is I have enough music coming out of it on normal day to day basis. Thank you.

I started to get a little cranky with the little whippersnapper, and redirected HIM back to my original choice. He conceded and said he would go back to the warehouse to see if they had any in stock. Of course, they didn't.. Well, then why in the hell do they have the display model sitting there and mocking me??

I left in a huff.

Then I huffed off to Office Depot, and they had all their MP3 players locked up like Fort Knox, and you couldn't even touch them. They didn't even have a display model, you had to choose from pictures on locked boxes on the shelves. What, are these things made of.... gold?

Good grief, all I want to a simple MP3 player with touch screen. Are you as tired of reading this as I am telling you about it. How can something so simple become so frigging difficult. I guess I will have to buy my DVD set on the internet. I was hoping I could just pop in the store. But...ohhhh no.

My smoke alarm has been going all the live long day. It's been raining and raining and raining, and the humidity is nuts ...and it thinks it is smoke. Now, correct me if I am wrong, but I think smoke and humidity are two different things. If I would have wanted a humidity detector I would have bought one, but as it is I bought a SMOKE detector ...which never goes off even if I burn shit on the stove. Probably if I would have enough moisture in the stuff I am burning, it would catch the steam and start to BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP. Oh god that sound is ripping my soul apart today.

I am pissed off at everything. And another thing, I made a batch of wine two weeks ago, and it won't "clear up." It's a bunch of mud. This has never happened before in all my wine making days. So tonight I had to drink Kool Aid. Well it might as well be Kool Aid....somebody gave me this sissy strawberry wine for Christmas. And on a Saturday night, my night to let my hair down! I'm drowning my sorrows with some fresh raspberries I picked from the garden and low fattyass ice cream...yumm.

Have a good weekend.

Can't anything ever go right around here?

No.

It really, really is "always something" and it's pissing me off more than I can say.

Gord is forever stressing over something he has brought about himself, which is making me crazy.

Our phone broke today, and we blamed it on the telephone company. You would have thought the world came to an end...no phone. Ahem...we have two cell phones sitting on the charger.

The dog was mad at me because I wouldn't go out in the backyard for playtime. It was only 5,000 degrees in the shade and the humidity was wavering at 100 percent.

This is what I have to deal with after leaving work, getting some groceries, cooking said groceries. Listening to bullshit, then the phones go dead, and the dog and Gord act like asses and make my life miserable..because life didn't go their way today. Well, welcome to my world.

I think Gord and the dog, might want to give me a little more respect. I feed them, I listen to their sorrows, and sometimes I don't have time or don't want to listen to their bullshit. But I do. Even though I work 5 days a week...any haven't had a holiday in 30 years.

There, I feel better now.

All I have to say, is the dog doesn't know better.

This too shall pass.

Can't anything ever go right around here?

I point is...I have no point

It's hot, and I'm holed up in the house. Me no like the hot weather. It's been cool and wonderful until now. Dammit!

I picked a bowl of raspberries out in the garden and got stung by the first mosquitoes of the year, so yeah, the heat brings those little bastards out.

And I had to water my plants for the first time. Mudder Nature has been doing it up till now, how I miss her.

I made a nice macaroni salad, and a fresh cucumber salad with fresh dill for supper...plus a cold cut sammich on Ciabata bread. Gord just came home, so lets just try it before anyone says it good. hmm.

I left out the eggs in both my salads, because Gord thinks eggs are only for frying. So I put them in my salads only.

Are you yawning yet? I am.

Isn't this exciting? I'm not wearing a lampshade, just my own hair. Borrrrring.

Just a sec, I'm going to go to facebook and steal a pic of my two nieces who I loves to pieces. My niece Lisa was a bridesmaid for her cousin Ashely at her wedding. Lisa is in the middle and Cheri is the one on the right. Doesn't Cheri look like a young Cameron Diaz? I think so. Cheri and Lisa I smootch you guys even if you don't read auntie joanie balonies blog so much anymore. How dare you get lives of your own.!

The girl on the left...I don't know who she is...but I think it is a cousin from there mom's side of the family. She has pretty good rack. Did I just type that? And a tattoo...yikes. What is going on? But ..you know I have thoughts of getting a temporary one....on my forehead that says, "what was I thinking?"


Lisa looks so pretty in her dress. She is the Princess of the family. Now if you could see Cheri's eyes ...they are so amazingly blue/grey she looks like a young Cameron Diaz. Whenever I see a movie with Cameron Diaz I swear she is related to Cheri because she almost sounds like her too.

I started this blog way before supper....and just a note:

Supper tasted like "ass." The only thing that tasted good was the fresh cucumber salad. Just a note to those who are buying low fat cheddar cheese....that shit doesn't melt right. I turns into a piece of orange plastic, and it doesn't taste much better either. Going back to real cheese. Screw that shit.

Now I'm going over to facebook and screw around with some heads over there, I'm done with yours.

Oh so there you are

I have just been hanging around with my favourite friends...








Then I got the challenge from Poolie to put a bucket on my head and take a picture. It really doesn't seem like a grown up thing to do, does it? Is this the legacy we will leave our children ..or nieces and nephews? I pondered upon that for about two seconds and then I grabbed my camera.

I couldn't find a bucket. So, if you have ever watched "Keeping up Appearances" an English Sit Com you will know it is pronounced "Bouquet." I could not find a Bouquet. Hyacinth Bucket (Keeping Up Appearances) So I did the next best thing. I am Hyacinth's Canadian sista. Joanie Balonie Bucket/Bouquet. And I put a bag on my head. Yeah, you figure that one out. I think I must have bought fish that day...oy it was stinky.

Then, I said "what the hay"...why not wear a lamp shade, you wine soaked piece of cake? So I did. I'm not too handy with the camera in the bathroom mirror mind you. But if you look closely I think I look like La Toya Jackson.

On another note, I have a next door neighbour. Yes, she is nice, and yes she is annoying as hell.
We have been neighbours for twenty some years now, and I know her schedule. Every night at exactly 7:15 PM she comes out to her yard and starts puttering around. (she knows I'm up on my deck just after playing with the dog or walking her on her good days) . I can see her working down there. And I know what is to come:

At 7:18 she will siddle up to my side of the fence...here she is



Little miss happy face leaning over the fence. She is retired, and much younger than me, for shit's sake. I just hate people who make good decisions for their retirement.

So, miss happy face starts talking to me on my deck...and half the time I can't hear her, because either the dog is barking or someone is mowing their lawn, but that does not stop her from talking.

Over the years, I have come to know what she is going to say anyway, so I just wing it.

1. She will comment on our raspberry bushes, which have moved from my garden to hers.....so if she points to the right when she is talking, I know she is talking about the raspberries. I respond and say "Wow...it's been a bad year with all the rain, but they are starting to come in now"..then the dog barks...and she is talking again, and I can't hear her. But I smile, and say ..yes!

2. Her next comment will be about some creeping vines she planted right next to our fence..which are coming through to our side. She is so worried the will crowd out my ferns. Every day we talk about this, and every day I can't really hear her concerns from my deck But when she points down from her vantage point I know she is talking about the vines. Sometimes I know she can't hear me especially if the dog is barking at her...and I give her the "forgetabout moves" with my hands. And she laughs...and I laugh... and I hope she goes away. But most times, she does not.

Apparently I have not had the low down on all her Grandchildren, and what all the other neighbours do when I am away at fucking WORK.

I had fun on the deck on Thursday. To the left of our fence...she and her son and law were building a shed on their property. Two of her daughters kids were left alone on their immaculate lawn to play while they were working. There was a gate separating them. They could hear them and were only a few feet away.

It was funny as hell, these kids come from a family of four and roughhouse all the time. Nothing is sacred. Plus they had a new puppy. A lot of running was done, while Grammy and SIL were putting up the shed. Suddenly the oldest ..about 8 years old told her younger bro...about 6...Look!!! Grandma has a pear tree? It took the young one about 2 seconds to climb it and start ripping out the little baby pears. Finally when he couldn't reach them anymore he came down, and his sister started to jump up and grab the branches. They worked those branches, until finally a big one broke. They looked at each other, and they knew..THIS WAS NOT GOOD.

The older girl, told her little bro...."oh man, we have to hide this from grandma" and off they went and put it away back in her yard.

About 10 minutes later, neighbour lady comes into the backyard and sees the carnage...little baby pears everywhere, plus the new puppy was eating them!!!! Both children were sat down by their dad and asked...WHO DID THIS? Fingers pointed from one to the other....And everyone was sad, Daddy wasn't buying it.

When neighbour lady started to talk about this, I told her I saw the whole thing, she got a little defensive, but I couldn't hear her, all I saw was her hands reaching for heaven. I got the picture.

Or maybe she was infected with rabies.

I bow to you my friends.

This last week I have certainly done something...I have told the whole internet I am out of touch. And...just a tad stupid. I finally looked it up tonight. I just didn't get it. And when I found out, I went...ohhhh I was disappointed. I knew it was something to do with yoga, or I thought it did. But nothing made sense. Plus I was still trying to have a little fun. But I really didn't know.

I certainly will have to go downstairs to my little old library, and dig up my old Kahlil Gibran books, and get back my to my inner self. Put the petals back on the rose so to speak.

I was so sure it meant Eff off bitches.... that just sounded so cool and so confident. Now when I read those blogs, I will be a little disappointed, they are wimps!

Yeah I know they are giving the writer a "high five" so to speak, but I just thought there was more balls behind it.

I think I need more time to get rid of my old unwanted hair.

NASTURTIUM...bitches

I still have no idea, even after spelling it wrong, for heavens sake. I thought of making sure I was spelling it right after I wrote the blog, but I was pretty cocky. And look where that got me, with an egg planted squarely in the middle of my big fat face. This is why I don't go to BlogHer. I can't even get the trendy stuff right. I would have been shunned.

Have you ever read a book and read one of the characters names wrongly at the beginning, it sticks with you right to the end of the book, so it is with me and Namaste. God!

Poolie said:
Namaste means.....oh.....should I tell you? I use it frequently (but not in writing). I also use it as a joke. Na-mas-te and na-mas-go. I won't tell you what it means. I think you are having more fun figuring it out.

Namaste, mi amiga!

I think it is Spanish for something.

But I keep on going over it and over it, and all I see from her description is German. Because that is all know.

In German/mennonite Na-mas-te... would sort of translate into ..."Hey..must you?" And na-mas-go, would mean "you must go". Sorry I just don't get it.

When Poolie said, she used the word a lot.. but not in writing, I was considering it meant "Fuck" because she rarely uses that. But, when I sort of translated it into German .."Hey, must you"..and then "you must go", I came up with Fuck off. But I don't think that is what it is. It's probably some Yoga shit everyone is into. But then why does Poolie say she uses it as a joke? Poolie know a lot of stuff, even about a camels toes in your pants. heh

Damn it. I still haven't looked on google, it's killing me man.

Nastame

What does that mean?

I am reading so many blogs and they....the bloggers are using this word. I refuse to google it. I'm sure it just another "new age" expression of some sort.


Some just sign off and say Nastame... and others go..Nastame Bitches! when signing on. I am putting myself in the dark, because sooner or later someone has to give me a hint on their blog to what it means....ya know..so I can relate to what they are talking about before they hit the Nastame button.

Is it a bean?

Does it mean ...hello or goodbye in another language?

Is it a "high five" in Zimbabwe?

I'm trying to figure out the Latin origin.in my head, which is totally useless...but I do remember taking that course in school in the early 1900's.

It's been taking over my life for the past week.

Nast...what is nast? nasty? I'm thinking if you said the word aloud you would say nahhhstame. Nothing is working for me with this word.

The closest I can come up with is Nasturtium, but that's a flower.

Are the bloggers greeting each other with a "flower word" followed with the word "bitches?

The word actually sounds like a power word. You pump your arm up and go....Nastame Bitches! But then when the sign off they say "have a good day"...Nastame. huh?

It's a fucking secret code. And no... I will not google it! But it's making me and my dog very edgy, because I called my dog Nastame today. Who knows, this might be the name of a famous dog. Penny didn't come when I called her Nastame. She took the high road, and gave me a look that said "have another drink you Nastame wine soaked bitch. " So, obviously the word has something to do with either bitches or maybe witches or wine.

NO..I will not look it up.

I'm not any closer to figuring it out then when I started.

Maybe it means "Peace" in another language. I just thought about that. Well if it does...for god's sake just say so...trust the young one's to fuck up all the sayings we had in the 60's., and try to make it their own. But, on the other hand they are not saying "Nastame Out." And I don't think they have flowers eg. Nasturtiums in their hair.

I am still ...so puzzled.

And, don't go and look it up and tell me what it is. I'm going to figure this out by myself.