THIS IS THE TITLE, BECAUSE BLOGGER WON'T LET ME PUT ONE ON: One would think I didn't pay my bill...

LIFE IS A BITCH!!

Living with Gord, is like living with drama and "issues"...day and night. It's a Soap Opera. He is a worrier, and worries everything to death. He second guesses his every move. These last few years, I would liken it to a huge huge table (boardroom style) with 500 hundred chairs around it, and a piece of paper on the table in front of each chair ... stating the issue. One would think that at least one of these issues could be resolved, and the chair and the piece of paper could be removed. Not so. Most of these issues are business related, and some are personal, but we have to keep them on the ready in case a situation comes up again. Do not remove the chair.

You see, we can actually come to terms with an issue and almost put it to rest....but... what if? So, the document stays on the table. Sometimes, I get under the table and bite his ankles, and tell him to shut the fuck up already, it's over, lets put this document to bed. He agrees, and eventually I see the same chair and document sitting there again. Just in case. Today for example, (And this is just a mild example) I asked him to repair the water hose where he had cut off the end because it was leaking. (two weeks ago)and was going to bring home something to fix it...today it was a major challenge, so great, he added another chair to the boardroom. All our water hoses are ten years old, and fucking leaking, let's just get out and buy new ones...would be my answer, his answer is let's just sweat this, and try to FIX it. We have three hoses attached to each other because our tap is in the front of the house and they aren't long enough to reach the back yard. (I have an issue paper somewhere on the desk, that says lets get another tap installed in the backyard) ..I think that one was tabled for 2008. So, now we are in a real dilemma, all the hose ends are leaking. He decided to repair them...awwww fuck....I know where this is going!! He gets two of them fixed, but the last long one which leads into the back yard, has sprung a leak at the nozzle. Now, we don't have anymore old hose parts to fix the last hose, "we are hosed!! "forthelovehosiers. He was looking a little freaky by this time, so I didn't want him to have "an incident"...so I said .. it's okay all my plants will wait for rain...no big deal. Of course he knew I was snowing him, and became more irate at the hoses. So, he found one of those spiral twisty hoses in the garage, disconnected the offending 20 year old hose, and attached that. Well, we now don't have enough water pressure to take a piss. Those things are usless. I congratulated him on his innovative idea, and send him on his way to the shop to deal with more trying issues we still have on the table. But this one is still on the table because it has not been completed because that hose still does not work properly. One more chair.

One should never mess with the boardroom table, because he will notice if an "issue" is missing. "hey" ... he will shout, "did you try to stop me worrying?" .. Nope, says I, I thought it was resolved! "What" shouts he, what will I worry about when all is worryless? Well, I says to him, worry about that you dink!

On weekends when all the work in almost caught up on, he makes a project. A project which usually involves me. (Remember the patio)? Hey, I don't wanna no projects, I got enough of my own shit on the weekends. So, just to scare me, he goes out and loads up 4,000 lbs. of appliances on his trailer given to him from his customers and drags them back to our garage to fix. Hey, bud...didn't we just have an incident? We have an appliance shop, but...oh lord you don't know the crap he's got in there. That is a chair in itself.

You don't know the half. Sometimes he gets up in the middle of the night (that is his worry time) and jumps in his truck and goes back to the shop to make sure he turned off some explosive device...or if he turned on the burglar alarm, or if .. or if.

Nothing comes easy here in balonieland. Everything must be discussed and rediscussed until you are ready to start stacking the chairs in the boardroom and say fuck it. We just bought a piece of property to build our next house on, can you imagine how large that boardroom will be? We will have build an annex. I was hoping to take some issues off the table before then. We are trying to sell our properties, as we are graduating to our retirement HA HA HA.. He can never part with anything he owns. He needs a bigger shopping cart. He would be the bag man, with a washer, dryer and a dishwasher in it. Dragging it all over Canada....wailing "Appliances for Sale"....

I guess I am over reacting, ME? I just want to close down the boardroom, and get all the issues off the table and live a life without stress. But, I don't see that happening anytime soon.

I long for the days when we were free spirits, and didn't give a crap about anything. We bought houses, motor homes, etc. and wasted money. We had one hell of a time. Party time all the time. Now we got to do all the grown up shit. Boo.

We totally deserve each other.

Monday night supper:

Chicken Sweet and Sour Meatloaf with rice and salad. Hopefully it will taste better than Penny's chicken dog food. It could be a toss up!

Update: Hey, it was pretty good. I got the recipe off the internets and ..yes, it
tasted very good. I have noticed if you are making burgers or anything else with ground turkey or chicken, that shit is heavy!! ... and it doesn't shrink like it does when cooking with beef .. it's firm and filling. It also takes on the flavour of the stuff you are adding to it. I give it a 8 out of 10.

That is one thing I am taking off the table. I have to, we ate it all. I guess we should start eating all the other shit too.