Duck!.

I'm talking about making food.

Of course, only having an hour or so to put supper together every night I usually don't get too inventive. Some of my supper's taste like duck shit, and then the next week, they taste pretty good. Why is that, I ask myself? I have discovered that if you put "Italiano Four Cheese Blend" shredded cheese in everything you make, it will be worth eating. Hey, it's worth the effort. You can put it on dog shit and it will taste good!!

I made the most incredible Scalloped Potatoes with ham on Tuesday, (just made it up as I went along). Yummers. And it had the secret cheese ingredient in it. It was orgasmic..I tells ya.

I bought a "feather bed" yesterday. It's not a real bed, but it's a comforter looking thing you put on top of your mattress..or in my case the water bed. I bought it from a place called Jsek. Nobody I know pronounces it the same. Some say JAYSEC, some say JASEC, and others say YASEC.give me a break.. I think that the "J" is silent. So I just call it, ja.se..choo..God bless you! (feathers..get it?) I'm funny like that. Anyway, the feather bed is a hit!! The heater in the waterbed still isn't cooperating and we have to hit it on it's head with a pair of pliers every night to get it going. The feather bed is about 3-4 inches high and filled with duck feathers. It was very comfy and warm last night. But, I had me some duck dreams last night...naked ducks without their feathers, crying out into the night. Like the old song.

There's a little white duck sitting in the water
a little white duck doing what he oughter
he took a bite of a lily pad
flapped his wings and he said "I'm glad
I'm a little white duck sitting in the water
quack! quack! quack!"

and then after the incident

There's a naked little duck sitting in the water
a naked little duck doing what he oughter
flapped his wings (just a smidge to hard and someone stole all his feathers) ouch.
and he said "I'm glad
I'm a little naked duck sitting in the water
waiting for my feathers to grow again .. like they oughter.
quack! quack! quack!

Nothing like going to bed with the remains of your fine feathered friends

What was I thinking Donald?

Disclaimer: I love animals .. and if they want to skin me..so be it... go for it. But, as some Safeway clerks have remarked, I am a little long in the tooth..so I might be a little "chewy."