Tuesday, May 10, 2011

I have to write this quick

Explorer keeps knocking me off here.  I wrote the longest post yesterday only to find that blogger saw no need for me to keep in touch either.  Bastards..

Quick update:  Bro is still in limbo.  He is awake, but still very tired.  I have been there 3 times now and he has been asleep and I can't wake him up.  I always manage to come after he has had visitors and that tuckers him out.  For me..it is a long journey to the hospital because it is on the other side of city...so when he was stabilized I only go every two days.  His family keeps me up to date when I don't go that day.  It is so disappointing to just have to sit there and watch him snore.  I left a message on our family board in his room that I have been there....but hey...I want to hear his voice.  Tomorrow.  Hopefully he will be awake...or I might have to set a firecracker under his ass.

In my long winded post yesterday I was telling you about Hospital Parkades.  We call any parking facility over two stories a Parkade.  So keep that in mind.  Long story short:

In the last week and a half I have learned a lot of stuff .....

I have lost my truck and wandered around a parkade this very scary part of town trying to find it.

Elevators don't always take you to where you are going. And sometimes they don't even open up.

Always carry lots of change .. or a credit card because you will never get out of the parkade without it.  3 bucks for half an hour. Make sure you tell the person you are visiting  you care alot about them in a hurry unless you want to hit the 6.00 dollar mark.

Always ... look around you in the parkade it's a pretty scary place.  Especially downtown like this one is.

Parking is the pits my friends.  On Friday I had to park on the highest level of the freaking Parkade.  Level #5.  The level of the devil.  When SIL and I were in my Bro's room which overlooks the parkade I told her we could see my truck from there.  I was all ..hey...look there is my truck!   Garry was still sleeping at that time. So there was not much else to talk about.

I left before she did....and apparently she saw me on the 5th. level wandering around looking for my fucking truck. I'm sure she was laughing.... it wasn't there....the truck I was looking at from the hospital window was another black SUV...but not mine.  To make this story shorter and a little less embarrassing...I found it on the 4th. floor.  But that came at some cost.  Okay the story will be a little longer...

While of the 5th. floor floundering around like a big ole beached whale looking for my beloved rusty ole truck ... I spotted an elevator at the far end.  NOT the elevator I took up there.  This was a new shiny elevator.  I was a little sceptical at first but  I hopped in and decided to go back to the 1st. floor and find the bread crumbs I had left on my path to the 5th. floor when I first started my journey. I entered #1 and as I started down I realized I must be at a different part of the huge hospital system....this elevator had windows and I could see the street below.  (SIL saw me in the elevator too..haaa)...but when I got to the the 1st. floor the door would not open.  Dear God....I was beside myself with all this bullshit...I just wanted to sit down and cry.  But instead of trying to get help I punched all the floors from 2-5 and it went back up one floor at a time.  My reasoning was it had to stop at least one of these floors and open... It.did.not.  Here I was again...on the fucking 5th floor...and the door would not open.  I punched #1 again ... and down I went again.  As I was sitting on the ground level ... and thanking God for not letting me get thrown down the elevator shaft in the basement ... I was so upset I couldn't even find the panic button. I decided to punch #1 again.... and the DOOR OPENED.  I ran out of the building.

I ran over a few people in wheelchairs...wiped out a few on walkers...sideswiped a few who were having a smoke in front of the building.  I found the cross walk back to the Parkade...put on my thinking cap... and figured I was probably parked on the 4th floor.  This time I did not take the elevator...I took the stairs.  I found my baby in about 2 minutes.  My SIL had witnessed most of this from my brothers room.  I'm pretty sure that is why she never let me babysit the kids when they were young.

Went home and drank a bottle of wine. Smoked a pack of cigs's ...did some LSD...and yeah...just mellowed out.  Actually it was more like 2 Tylenol and magic mushroom soup.   heh.

Hospitals are stressful enough....but trying to figure out the system is worse.  Just a note...next time I go I will write the parking spot number on my ticket.  Oh yeah...it's fun getting out of there too.  First you have to go to a pay station and present the ticket you got when you came in. (If you can find it) ...nutter story.  You stick it in the machine and it yells at you....PLEASE INSERT ALL YOUR ?DOLLARS...and as you are inserting your 100.00 DOLLARS..it keeps telling you to do this over and over ...until you want to kick it's ass.  The overhead camera is the only thing that keeps me from coming down the ramp with my SUV after I have paid and taking it out.

I'm going back for more tomorrow.  Bro better be awake because I has a lot of stories to tell him.  And tomorrow I think I might look for street parking ....which is at a premium.

Don't let me forget to tell you about how I put streaks in my hair today.  Why get a professional do what you can fuck up all by yourself?

Anyone want to send me a hat? 

Balonie...treading carefully....


Donna said...

It's Bad enough trying to deal with a sick loved one but Also having to deal with Fricking Parking is insane! You BE CAREFUL in that parkade by yourself!!
Still praying for Brother And you!

judemiller1 said...

Hopsital parking is the pits!!! Then when you get inside, the hospital is so big it is hard to find out where you need to go. AND you have to walk forever!

Sally said...

Oh my goodness, what a story, Joan! The only good thing about parking when Britt spent so many weeks in the hospital, there you tell the receptionist which room she's in, and you get free parking. That doesn't help though when you try to find your car! Can't wait to see your hair. And, I'm still praying for all of you. ((hugs))

Dawn said...

OMFG !! That just scares the shit out of me. It was like me when Roy had his kidney stone out. I hope things were better today !! I wanna see hair pictures !! :)

Donna said...

Just checking on you little love...(((hugs)))