Thursday, October 29, 2009
I got Gord a set of wrenches for his birthday...I did. They were black. He loves black. But apparently he has so many wrenches he is starting to shoot them out his ass. He thanked me very kindly for the black wrenches. You see in our new house he will have a new shop with black and silver huge tool boxes, and I thought black wrenches would look cool. Black is the new black. I was wrong. So, I will lug the huge mess of wrenches back to Canadian Tire tomorrow and take them back. I never know what to get a guy who has every tool God invented.
We have had a long standing love for a song by Willie Nelson. It all started off very innocently 20 years ago or so. I'm not much of a country music fan, but I heard Willie sing "You are Always on my mind" way back when...and I bought the "record"...no not the "tape"...or "CD" ... the drop dead record with a nice jacket on it.
I remember when he got home that night and I played it for him.
It was a Friday night...and I was feeling my oats...or wine.
He really liked the song. We were sitting in the kitchen when I asked him if he wanted to DANCE. He looked very surprised. He cleared his throat a few times, looked a little uncomfortable and said..."in the house?" Apparently Lutherans don't dance in their own homes. Lutherans only dance in specified locations like at wedding receptions in the back woods of Southern Manitoba.
He didn't dance with me that day. But ever since that this has been a standing joke between us. Whenever we hear the song at home, I will ask him to dance.... and he won't.
Yesterday, I bought him a card for his 65th. birthday. It's one of those cards that play a song. And guess what it played? ....and yes, he got up and took me in his arms and danced with me.
Mind you, it was the short version, but we did dance. Now all my dreams have come true. We did the Willie dance in the kitchen.
It doesn't take a lot to make me happy.
Then we had Cherry Pie....that is almost better than dancing.
Sunday, October 25, 2009
I woke up Saturday morning with a shooting pain from my shoulder to the back of my head at every two or three minute intervals.
On Friday night I knew I was soooo tired and could barely get to bed fast enough after we watched the late news etc. On Saturday when I woke up, I don't think I ever shifted a position during the night. I was all crunched up. My head was at a odd angle, and when I woke up...ouchie's.... owww. I took a few Tylenol, but still I had that stupid little pain going right from my shoulder up into my eyeball and whipping off the top of my head. It feels like a nerve has shorted out or something. Damn it is annoying.
I'm off to take care of the pain. Wine.
No more whining.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Things that are happening in my life:
I have a umm a boil in my nether region. I don't know the technical term, but I sure hope it pops soon it's hard to sit some days.
I found a tick behind Penny's ear tonight....IN OCTOBER? yikes I sort of paniced but took a yank at it and thew it in my chicken coop. Oh, I forgot I don't have chickens....it's been that kind of night.
Last night I dreamt we had a chicken coop in the back of our new house. I have been reading this blog too long. http://bitchypoo.com/ One of my favourites.
I have a cold and am trying to muster my mustard up. I think I can muster my busterfricking mustardup. I may have a fever...ignore anything else I may write.
Umm.. I not quite finished.
We are having soup for supper....and if you would hear these words coming from my mouth, you would hear...wa r aving oup fr upper. I played it for awhile...because, let's face it.. it just a little cough...Then Gord, took his handy dandy mental bat and beat the cold right out of me.
Damit...I can't get any sympathy.
I'm feeling better already. I just wanted to take a day off work ...
I'm going to have to take acting lessons. Fuck
Monday, October 19, 2009
on second look--if "he" lies to the left, I might be near his junk. Like the cartoon though.Oh Canada, Our home and native land! True patriot love in all thy sons command. Oh Canada, we stand on guard for thee.That's all I know of the anthem. My son, a huge hockey fan (and player) wanted to learn the lyrics once when he was about 12, so we learned them and used to sing them a lot, but i've forgotten most of them. Sorry--I guess we belong in the pants of Canada.
You must be SO excited about the new house; I know I would be!!Sorry you have a cold; that's SO miserable.Take care of yourself, Joan. :)It'a always nice to see you've poster.
Oh man, I'm in the crotch area. I sure hope he don't have cooties. :-) I'm so excited for you about the new house plans! I know you and Gord are looking forward to getting it going.
I live on the right thigh. Thank goodness I am in the ball-less zone! I added you to my new site, lady. http://50percentwhine.wordpress.com
Well if Miz Brenda lives in the crotch area, I guess I live in Mexico...thank goodness!HahaaHappy for you about the house planning Joan! It'll be Fun!Get to feeling better!!!hughugs
Sunday, October 18, 2009
One flock in particular, flew over and sounded a little terrified. There was a whole lot of honking going on. And about a minute later there was a little goose who was coming up the rear, crying because he couldn't keep up. Normally the geese sound like: HEE HAW, HEE HAW. These hippy drug induced geese were going HAW HEE, HAW HEE. Plus I think they were trying to loose the little guy. Bastards. It's not funny.
5 minutes later, the same flock came over. Well I'm not entirely sure it was the same flock, because there were tons of them, but it looked like they circled my house and came back the other way....with the same little guy behind them again. I think that would be a lot of trouble to go though to ditch a goose. High school mentality maybe. He probably squealed on the head goose for goosing another goose. I know they mate for life, but what says they don't try to get a little on the side? I was going to google "goose" today, but I really like my version, and I hate it when they tell me I am wrong. Out of sight, out of mind. I like to stay stupid.
I had had a busy weekend. A very nice weekend actually. Lot's of people dropping in and calling. Hippy Chick came in from the farm with the latest drawings of the new house. She came over for AA hour last night for a bit, just to drop them off, and let us go over them. She came to town to go to the opera, so it was good timing. She came back this morning and we had coffee and brunch and went through them step by step. I am totally in love with it.
These are the final (sort of)drawings, and I can now envision what it is going to look like. I have such a difficult time imagining rooms on paper. I can now see the elevations and stuff and see how my front porch will look like and the roof lines. She has a few more things to go over before we get it finalized and we can bring it to those that have to give us quotes..eg. the kitchen, baths, doors, windows, heating A/C fireplaces. flooring's etc. Things we have to know before we get a contractor involved. So that will be our homework assignment this winter.
So, this means I will have to get my head out of my ass and try to makes decisions..oy.
I have a cold. Swine flu came to mind immediately. But so far I don't think I have killed a pig with my germs....or ummm or how does this work? As I said before I'm not about to google it because I like staying in the dark. There is just WAY to much information out there for me to process. So, I won't sneeze in front of a pig. If I do, I will bend my head into the crook of my arm and hork on big fat booger on it. Because, I'm all about saving the pigs.
I will however have the flu shot, because I loves me a pork roast.
A friend on facebook FROM CANADA sent me this pic. I thought it was so funny...it's for all you
I want to know who lives in the crotch area? We are the guys who live UPSTAIRS. I need to know who of you ...live in the "Penis Part" of the good ole USA. I noticed you have "no balls." ...but to be fair they may have been tucked in the pants as well.
Keep waving the flag. I think the pants are a little too tight however, the drawer or drawest of this might just have a little game going on in their heads. And made your Kingdom look a tad smaller than it is.
Have a good week, I will try to post more often...but I gotta a lotta shit going on.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
I have something niggling in the back of my mind. Just a niggle.
I don't usually post about my work, because I'm not sure who is reading it. But I am sure after all these years on line they probably would have got bored and went to greener pastures. And, if not, this is what is on my mind.
Our company is moving...just down the street mind you, not far away. We are going to rent a 5,000 sq. ft. building that is being built especially for us.
On Friday my boss informed me that a "new girl" would be starting on Monday (today) and she was going to co-ordinate the move. Meaning we will need to do a lot of stuff with the phones, new furniture, blah blah blah...all the shit the needs to be done to make a smooth transition. Also she would be available to help around the office if need be. "Bells started to ring in my head"....opp's is this my successor? After all I am 64 years old and she is about 9. And very pretty and smart. Plus she has ties with his family. I think I am doomed.
On my birthday last week he was kidding me about being ahem..old...and he went on to ask what my plans were after I reached 65. You know 65..the year you are supposed to spend your winters in Arizona and your summers in your motor home travelling throughout the US, and parking in trailer parks with ole folks of the same ilk. Playing horse shoes? I said I wasn't there yet, and probably would make a decision on that when I felt I needed to.
So, I don't know. I don't feel comfortable. At all.
I have been in this situation once before where family members and friends needed a job and I was the victim and let go. But, I am hoping this won't be the case. I have been there for 13 years.
I really was going to retire next year, but just didn't want to make the commitment just yet. Because I don't get retirement.
I don't get it at all. It all seems so final. I don't want to sit and crochet in front of the TV and chase kids off my front lawn. I don't want to motor home (ever).
I should have called this the "Old Farts Lament"......
How do you get older but feel the same as you did when you were 20? Nothing really changes except the hormones, plus you are a whole lot wiser. But you are still who you were and are....that never changes..but your body does, and people can't see beyond that . They think in numbers...numbers is the key. We all have been taught to think in numbers.. like "how old is that bread on the shelf?...how much do I weigh? How much money do I make? What day is it? When is my Mastercard payment due?...........numbers. And as we age...we are seen as numbers, by the well deserved lines on our faces. I would appreciate not being called a senior citizen. First I was called a teenager, then I was called a newly wed, then I was called someone who was in mid life, after that I was a baby boomer, then I was called someone who was approaching her golden years and now a fucking senior citizen. Good Grief. Stop with the labels... My name is Joan for shit's sake. Can you see me?
But guess what...I have a whole lotta shit left in me. I gotta whole lot of life left in me..
And that girl ain't taking my job. Like I said it was just a "niggle" but if niggle comes to shove ..someone should take cover. I still have some ammo in my pants.
I have probably over reacted to the grey hair I found in my eyebrow. Who knew your eyebrows got grey?
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Friday, October 09, 2009
Wednesday, October 07, 2009
How did they know, we (Gord) was about to turn 65 this year? Are people in the cul-de-sac messing with our heads? Sending little kids to help the elderly?
What's next? Bringing walkers to our door? Making casseroles? Offering to go shopping for us? Port a Potties in the front yard in case we don't make it in the house and shit ourselves?
I was a little skeptical. So, I asked them why they were doing this. Because .. nobody does anything for nothing these days. They said "we just wanted to help around the neighbourhood." Yeah rite.... I slammed the door in their cute little faces. Because only 1 percent of the leaves have dropped...and you will never see them again when it's all down...little do-gooders liars!!
Well, I didn't really slam the door in their faces, I told them to come back in three weeks and see how much they like us then. As it is now, there is only about one rake full of leaves that have dropped..and they are all gung ho! Because there is sweet shit all to do! But, I have to give it to them for trying to look good. Sly little stinkers.
You know I love my dear husband...who by the way is totally unaware of technology..eg computers etc. He loves them as long as I do all the work, other than that...he still lives in a world without them.
This afternoon when we met for lunch at home we were watching some crap on TV and someone was secreting video taping someone else.... and he pipes up....oh yeah..."that guy will probably put that on face tube". Well I just about spewed my sandwich all over the table. Then I fell off my chair and started rolling on the floor laughing.. FACE TUBE...too frigging funny.
I'm still have little laughs coming up my belly when I think of it.
I guess he knows the lingo....but certainly does not have the concept.
I'm still laughing...and at his expense...sorry hon. YOU OLD FART.
Sunday, October 04, 2009