Tuesday, August 29, 2006

My dog has hate in her eyes

We just finished supper, we had baked farmer sausage, with new potatoes, and corn on the cob. I gave her 1/2 of an eaten cob, and now she is dragging it all over the house and growling. Fer God's sake..it's not even meat. When did dog's get to be veg heads? I'm going to put some tofu in her food dish tomorrow and see how far this has veggie dog trend has got to. She wouldn't let me near her until she ate the cob, then smacked her chops, after she finished it all. No apology for her unseemly behavior.

I can't wait to see what that looks like on the lawn tomorrow.

Sunday, August 27, 2006

I see blogger has a new beta version

Who is going to try it first? Opps you did? Nice knowing you.

Hey, after all the time I have spent getting freebie templates, they finally have gifted us with a few more new ones. Not bad for a service that charges you nothing. I really appreciate it, and I say that seriously because I can't afford WordPress because it's free. (small joke at my expense).

I'ts getting late tonight, but I just wanted to tell you folkers that..tonight a flock of geese flew over my deck ... so low..I could have grabbed one of their feets and pulled him down and had him for supper. Their flapping wings made my hair move. That is how close it was. It would have been much better than our supper tonight. Let's just say the steak we ate had been in the freezer..jest a little too long and tasted like ..ummm Ed Sullivan...kind old and tough. A goose would have been perfect. One can never get enough goose. (wink)

All is calm in chez Martinez...no climbing of trees, no carting around heavy cement patio slabs, just swatting a trillion wasps that have decided to make our home theirs. Yesterday I read a solution for that, "spray" Windex on your patio table and "wasps be gone.".... well it worked. I guess it's the ammonia in there they don't like, they didn't come close to the table again. But flies don't give a shit, they mainlined it... and flew off to Woodstock and jammed.

Getting late, Penny's sniffing around telling me to git my fat ass to bed.

(note to myself) "publish post"

Saturday, August 26, 2006

Found a interesting blog

This blog will either drive you crazy or make you want to talk funny.


I don't know why I can't make a direct link anymore. phoo

I'm getting addicted to it.

chapter the ist

Hit befelle uppon a day that SIR SEAN de JEHANNE, who was a yonge knight and a gentil, dide wander as adventures wolde gyde hym nere to the fayre citee of Honolulle. He lepede on his hors from manye an heigh hille yn slowe mocioun yn the maner of a goode knighte and a valyaunte. And whan it was nyghe none, Sir Sean cam to a grete bridge that was made of oold by the Romayns, and from that bridge did hange doun-ward an eremyte whos visage was ful hewn and bledde and al his clothes and the place aboute weren bloode red. And Sir Sean askede hym what he did ther and wherefor he was hanged and who had so grievousli him woundede; ‘Fle from this place, Sir Knight,’ he seyde, ‘For the man cometh who did thes woundes to me and he is a grete kynge but a felon and a traytour and hys name is KYNGE EDICHIM and he hath doon this to me by cause ich haue stood ayeinst hys grete outrages and felonies.’

Thursday, August 24, 2006

I've been getting messages from the blogging gods today

Everyone seems to want to help me out of my slump.
First I got this:

I hope it works..I had to cut and paste, but it's worth the while.

and then I got this:

Hey Joan
My name is Yvonne. I spent some time reading your blog on
Blogger.com today and I thought you might be interested in this

I work for a word of mouth marketing company called Matchstick and
I'm looking to give away brand new multimedia smart phones to a
number of qualified individuals and I feel you could be a great
candidate. Please have a look at the below criteria and feel free
to contact me with any questions you may have.

Thanks for your time, I hope to hear from you soon.

Matchstick Inc.
416-530-8000 x 211

I am looking for existing Rogers customers who meet the following

. Hosts a popular blog with 400+ hits a day

Okay Yvonne with a "Y".. did yee not see the (3) in my comment section. I personally try to keep my ratings low so as not to embarrass my competition. I didn't attend BlogHer this year only because I didn't want to take all the attention away from "Dooce"..who, by the way is the funnest person in the blogging hemisphere, go and bother her, she gets 400 hits a minute.

. A current Rogers cell phone subscriber (phone only
supported with the Rogers network)

Yvonne, with a "Y" ..you babe in the woods, if you would have seen my addy, you would have know I was an MTS subscriber. Nice trick.

. Between the ages of 22-35

Yvonne, with a "Y"..now you have gone and done it...you hurt my feelings, I'm much older than that, but I guess you were thinking I might want to "text" message all my "boy toys".. well Yvonne, actually can I call you vonne?, because I am tired of typing the "Y"...you can tell "Roger" the "doger" to stick it up hims arse..

. Keeps his/ her blog updated on a regular basis with
pictures and video
. Very socially active

Vonne, I keep my blog updated on a regular basis with pictures, but I am video challenged at the moment, but if you think I would be a good candidate, I would suggest you send me a free video camera..of good quality of course. I wouldn't want to give "Roger" a bad name with my bad quality porno movies.

And yes, I am very socially active, and have a few diseases to prove it.. I am the "hooker" between Sherbrook and Ellice, (you know the one with the whip). And all my boy friends are named John, who only subscibe to MTS.

This phone will give you a chance to start or continue photo and
Video blogging! We think you will thoroughly enjoy this product and
its features, and if you do, we would encourage you to talk about
it. If you or someone you know fits these criteria we would love to
hear from you!


Now isn't that a joke, I started out making fun of her name, and she signs it Vonne, LOL...I can tell she wants to be my friend.

P.S. Feel free to blog about this offer so fellow bloggers that qualify
can benefit from this too!

Okay all (3-4) of my readers...feel free to take VONNE...on her offer...what a dirtbag!!

I have noticed lately that advertisers have found a new medium, and try to find bloggers to put up their advertising in the side bars. Most of the really popular bloggers don't use the lowly free "blogger"..they use Word Press or some other company they have to pay for to put up their blogs.

I'm wondering where this world of blogging is going to. In a way it's exciting that this is now an attributed forum for so many different venues. From politics..Gardening, cooking, etc. to just shooting the shit. I'ts come a long way baby.

Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Don't make that spaghetti recipe just yet.. you know the one one yer left

It's not a TNT (tried and true) one. I am making it tonight. I can't get passed the sweet pickles, but the lady who sent it into NANCY'S KITCHEN promised nothing less than ..hey hey.. what can I say..about it! I'm starting to wonder if someone was fucking with Nancy's mind and she posted it to the recipe newsletter. Like maybe the next time they will send in a recipe and tell you to put two pounds of mice droppings in your blender, along with some chicken stock, and mix it all about..and we all do it..because someone said it tasted good..barf.

Sometimes we are followers, when it comes to recipes, and if it looks good, we make it. In my case this did not look good, but I did it anyway...because I'm an idiot. I took a few spoonfulls, licked at it and didn't find it awful, but nor did I find it fine! The truth will be in the pudding, when it goes over the pasta.

I never, but never, taste my food when I make it. I can't. I smell it, wave at it a bit and get the general idea. That is why we have so much garbage. I should actually get some of that crap in my mouth before I have to serve it to the dog.

I've been having one of those blog days in my head. I haven't had it for a long time. I have been writing everything I encounter on a day to day basis.. I am missing writing in a non-reactive way with some feeling, and telling a story. I started out doing that, and I stopped once I thought I was so funny. I know I have a sense of humour, but I think I let it get in my way of doing some good story tellin. Now, I have put myself in a deep dark hole...I'll have to come up with some good shit. I don't know, I just feel this way now, and want to talk about stuff other than our patio. God knows, we will both be dead by the time that is finished. And I got a shit load of stories to tell. Mind you, I will have to go back into my archives to make sure I haven't told them before this and embellished it all. Shit like that happens when you gets old.

I got a few good one's simmering in my head. Think partying nakid and ordering in pizza in 1972. I bet that Pizza guy has never forgot that party!! So, you see I have a basketfull of stories to tell...please don't judge me, as I was "a former flower child".. and now I am a full grown weed.

NOTE: DO NOT MAKE THE RECIPE, I WILL REMOVE IT ON THURSDAY...IT TASTES LIKE TOE JAM. I'M CHUCKING IT. Why in god's name would I even consider putting sweet bread and butter pickles in my spaghetti sauce? I have no common sense...none whatsoever..

Yours truly,
balonie..........it takes a village to make an idiot.

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

I'm wavering...waffeling.. wait that's not a word ..whatever..

I don't want to give Special K any chance to say "I told ya so", but I'm finding my blog a little hard to read. Maybe it's my old eyes...but if I was reading someone else's blog that looks like this, I would be hard pressed. It's too busy!! That damn Brenda, she changed her blog, and it's so nice and bright, and mine feels like a hole in the wall.

Soooo, I'll be taking me lumps, and try to brighten it up, because I can't stand it. I love to read clear and concise blogs, and this is not one of them. What in the devil is wrong with me? I was thinking I could tinker with the font and make it larger. Yeah... and throw all the side bars to hell...won't happen.

On another note, our evening of disaster last night didn't end until this morning. After Gord got up this morning, got dressed, and stepped out on the deck (without shoes) and gazed upon the light fixture he had dismantled yesterday, and he stepped in a pool of water with his socks. Ya know, all you can do is laugh when it just keeps on coming your way!!! fucccccccccdge.

Monday, August 21, 2006

Can you believe this? I mean..really..The Domino effect

Since Gord came home from work today, we have experienced some really bad things and they just kept on getting from bad to worse. He brought home a CAN of FOAM, to spray under the side of the garage where the water was coming in this spring. He was wearing his new pants..that I spent 3 hours hemming yesterday, (because I am not a good hemmer...but I sure as hell can HAW...nevermind. I stayed away from him tonight, mainly because I didn't want to have Foam sex, nor did I even want to see what he was about to destroy. It only took 25 minutes before he was in the house with half the foam all over his NEWLY hemmed pants. You can't get that shit out!! He had it all over his hands, on his shoes and ...Unfortunately none on his mouth. Bad luck I say. Do think it ended there? ...nooooooooh.

He took off his NEWLY HEMMED PANTS.. and went to the kitchen sink and sprayed the spot with WD40. Well, I cook in the kitchen, and had food ready for supper while he sprayed this shit everywhere! I knew he was worried that he had fucked up his new pants...so he just kept on going on about having to get it out. I finally grabbed them out of the kitchen sink and brought them into the bathroom and let him keep scrubbing. But, what I didn't notice was he had brought out the "GOO GONE", and was putting that on the "huge spot" as well. Okay folks, we all know we shouldn't be mixing chemicals. It stunk to high heaven in there. I put on the fan and told him to get the hell out of there and I would see what I could do. I washed out all the crap and put them in the washing machine. There is still a spot on the pants that will never come out, and it's around his fly...it looks like he just had a Foam Sex. ALL BY HIMSELF. So, he threw them back into the washer again...just in case magic would happen.

It didn't end there...oh no..just before supper he donned his housecoat, and strutted out on to the deck, juice glass in hand, pointing out to where he had severed the tree limb yesterday, and patting himself on the back for his efforts. Then he noticed that we had some water in the light fixture that shines down from the deck onto the back yard. He climbed up on a patio chair, took off the lens, and all the water poured down his housecoat. Now, his housecoat, and pants are all in the same wash. No one could make this shit up...gawwwd.. Oh, just wait a minute, during all this crap, the smoke alarm down in the basement was making a beeping sound, and I knew it meant the battery was low. Before HE could get there, I raced down and removed it by myself, God only know what would have happened it he would have tackled that job. It was straight out of a Pink Panther movie..and if I would have had the moves, I would have been Kato...and punched his lights out.

"Monday morning you gave me no warning of what was to be" those mama's and pappa's knew what they were talking about.

Sunday, August 20, 2006

Tree Sex


So, now we are here again "interneters"..my chance to spew a little of what has gone in my life this week. 

The fact that I am here at all is that we didn't work "smart" on the patio project today.  Nope, the boss gave me Sunday off, after all it's the Lord's day, and killing your wife with hard labour is frowned upon in heaven.  But..(you knew this was coming didn't you) his Lordship in his wisdom had another Sunday project planned. We have a tree limb about a foot in diameter that has been leaning into our eaves, and grunts and groans against the house every day. As an aside, it is right on top of our bedroom window.  Two weeks ago, he climbed the very tall ladder to the second story, and with a very dull saw cut away most of the branches.  It still grunted and groaned against the eaves every night.  Today, he came up with an electric saw.  This baby will cut down trees and can also be used to cut the stairs to our deck once we finish putting the patio stones back in place.  What a deal. My only thinking was, which one was going to kill him first. 

Okay then, he put the ladder (you know the one you saw me down on the ground with) back up to the highest point of the house.  There wasn't much room, between the tree and the house,  it was pretty well "straight up".  He got on the roof and started to take the biggest branches off before he took the limb off.  Those were big MF branches I tells ya, and when it fell, I felt the earth move.  I called up and asked him.."how was it for you"? He said "Man I am tired that was a big one", I said .."yeah, it was good for me too, it just missed my head".  All this in front of our neighbours to hear!.  Now they will know all our secrets. But like the twenty year old he is in his brain, he said "I'm going to chop off the rest of the offending limb from the tree trunk"... I called up, and said, enough already, you are going to kill yourself.  He said, "you are starting to piss me off"...WHAT! I yelled, just after we had tree sex!! You bastard! 

So, then he left the ladder that was propped against the house and stepped into the tree.  It's one of those tree climbing trees with a lot of huge limbs.  He positioned himself between the limbs lower down of the offending limb and sawed and sawed.  I was at the bottom holding the ladder, finally he said to me, "why are holding the ladder, I'm in the tree"?  Good question.  I guess I just like to help.  He finally asked me to get out of the way because the limb was going to fall any minute and it may just land on my "dogooder" head if I didn't move.  I didn't move, but was very surprised when it fell within inches of me while I was still holding the ladder with no one on it.  One can never be too careful. 

So, we cleaned up the yard, and I thanked God nobody was killed in our effort to stop the groaning above our bedroom window.  Our neighbours will miss that!

Gord and his bro Ron went out yesterday on their bikes to a small community in southern Manitoba to see the Windmills.  They are giant!!  And so majestic.  This is a new power source they are using in our province.

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Gord at the bottom of the big mudder windmill ...he's my cool Fat Kat. I liked the way the picture turned out with only the two props showing in the pic..what good luck photography. Give the guy a ladder and he would have climbed it!

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

His Bro Ron

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Thursday, August 17, 2006

Still tweaking

My recipe thingie isn't coming out like I thought. I think I have to put some code in front of each line to make it come out nice. I think. (make mental note) for tomorrow. I had a ton of blinkies ready to set up, but they were all too big, I even shrunk them in photobucket, but none worked except the Canadian one in red on the sidebar. Well, I don't want a whole lot of razzle dazzle, but some of them were so fine, they blew me mind. I will photoshop them and see what I can do.

Mowed de lawn tonite. First time since the end of June. Gotta love a drought. Finally everything looks the way it should, it only took the entire summer. Except for the friggin patio screw up.

Penny and I sat out on the deck tonight until 10:30, it was so beautiful while Gord was doing CNN inside. I was watching all the airplanes coming in from the east, going towards the airport. It was so quite out there, no noise (not even from the planes because they were far away) ...just my pond trickling, and a few crickets chirping...now that is what summer is all about. Not a mosquitoe in sight.

Okay, now I am going to go and publish this to see how it looks on my new blog skin...testing ..testing...

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

The boss is gone for the rest of the week

And I get to play.

Soooo, I found a template I love. But, it's a hard one, for the html challenged. So I will be playing with it all week and tweaking it. It has three sections, so it's very different than what I am used to. Let's see if I can get it working. I just worry it will look too busy. But, if it does, hey....I can change it again. I like change. It's easier than moving my living room furniture.

Monday, August 14, 2006

okay I got me an Andie Pandie bitch

I know you neighbours on the right hand side of my house have just recently retired. Until this time you have never entertained in your home. You had a cottage at the lake and did it all there. Apparently, from what I see now you have been building an entertainment centre in your backyard. Along with a fire pit. Now, don't get me wrong I loves me a good ole fire just like anyone else when I go to the lake. But, what I don't like is stinky smoke waifting over my deck in the city. I was sitting on the deck, and I smell like a roasted pig. You people no longer live at the lake, and we city folks don't take kindly to wood smoke getting into our eyes and clothes. My husband, the devout Lutheran coughs his lungs up with this smoke.

I realize you have sold your cottage and now are trying to relive that lifestyle in an urban setting. I don't know how to tell you I am pissed off. You have been good neighbours for over 20 years, except for the times your "head injured son" tried to kill my dog, and threw fire crackers on my roof. For those few incidents, I forgave. But, I can't understand your renewed interest in entertaining and setting a fire every night. I love the pond you built, even tho, it's a mosquito pit..and by the way good luck with having all yer grandchildren there every damn day!! I know you are in your freedom years, and your weird son has moved out, but fortheloveofaduck...all you do is yell at the grandkids and tell them not to touch this or that, and try not to drown them in the pond you built.

You have a lovely yard, a yard I would kill for, and sometimes I see you looking over my fence and smirking.. while your eyes survey my eclectic version of a garden and pond theme.

Just because me and mister are having words every Sunday as we are rebuilding the wall of China, gives you no right to put all the smoke in our pie holes. Got it!

Yesterday missing pics

I call this one...throwing out the baby with the bathwater.  This is where he unceremoniously dumped me after I was all used up.
Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
Patio.. under construction
Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
My sweet Penny
Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting
We took a little road trip last week-end to check out the harvest.
Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Sunday, August 13, 2006

Still trying to get the job done.

Another week come and gone. I have to apologize for not posting as much as I used to, but there doesn't seem to be enough hours in the day. Winter, my best friend will soon be here and I can justify spending more time online.

First week back at work from holidays was a little stressful, but I'm back to the old grind. I like structure, so at least now I'm not just pissing away my time. Well, not at home anyway that is... heh.

The German Vermin... was back at it today. Right after lunch, we had to get back to fixing up the patio. Lord. Don't Lutherans take the Sabbath day off? Apparently they don't. He pointed a stick at me and said.. "Und if ve dow'nt getz dis done son, it vill be vinter und den in spring ve vill be geflooded against. "....yeah right, where is my shovel?

So Plan A: for today was to take all the Sandbags he had stored out by the front fence, truck them in with the wheelbarrow to the back....break them open and start spreading the sand. These were old sandbags someone was giving away when they built the ark, and he brought them home. They were free, need I say more. It was pretty funny, he wheelbarrowed about 30 bags and scattered them on the ground of the patio. I was just coming down the stairs and he said to me in a ultra serious voice, "we will never get these bags opened, they are so strong we will need an Axe!"..As I peered down at him from the steps, I saw Fred Flintstone talking to me..I swear. Who uses axes nowaday except serial killers? The bag holding the sand is a made of a very strong plastic material, but it certainly is not axe worthy.

I said, we have an exacto knife in the toolbox, all I have to do is cut the bag... and pour. I gave my Lutheran the "look" and said "watch me." I went in the house and came out with my handy dandy exacto knife that I have used in a multitude of airline hijackings, waved it around his nose, came at him a little close with it zig zagged it close to his jugular, then bent down and cut the bag open...like it was butter. He was in awe. I think he was glad at last that he married a Mennonite woman, because if we are given the tools, we know how to use them. Even if we married one. Man..it was like butter.. I swear.

This is a big job, and since we are sixty something, we decided to "work smart." Take breaks, and don't work in the sun. If something can be lifted without to much stress, do that. Be inventive. Well, the Burgermeister forgot the rules half way throughout the game. He kept on bringing load after load of sandbags to the patio ..and I was cutting the bags open as fast as me little finger would go. Finally, I had to take the Lutheran aside and bring the knife up to his neck and whisper softly in his ear, "one more load"... and you are a dead man. Much later I brought some juice and snacks down to the patio, and we laughed ourselves silly at our folly.

We didn't get it all done, because "we worked smart"..ahem.. but we have a start on it and will keep on trucking till we either end up in the ER, or I cut him.

I tried to put up some pic's but of course blogger shut me down. I couldn't even put up a photofuckbucket one.

Just for the record:

Sunday night supper:

Pot Roast with delicious gravy ... I put a little red wine in the pot.
Roasted spuds
Broccoli/Cauliflower/new carrots in butter and Parmesan cheese
Whole wheat rolls
Dessert: Fruit loops..just kidding.

Sunday, August 06, 2006

Kumbya.. my Lord

It was a morning like most others, until Gord woke up. He said, "soldier", get your ass out of bed as we have a shit load of work to do in the back 40. I turned over, and said "Major General"..kiss this. He ignored my generous offer.

Striped of my blankets, I was forced to get up. I haven't been up before 11:00 AM for a whole week, and I felt a little addled. I got up and brushed my toes and then my teeth...and stumbled into the shower. Then I remembered today, was the day we were going to lift 100 patio stones each weighing more than the Titanic!! A strange peace enveloped me, I thought, okay, if I must leave this world today at the least, I'm going out clean.

We worked our asses off. The patio stones have to come off because they are sinking, and we believe that is the reason we have water in our basement every spring. So, the reasoning is, to build them up, with sand etc. until we are dead. Dead like door knobs. Originally we were only going to take off half of them, and put sand under them, until "Hitler" saw a flaw in his plan, and now has decided to pull up all of them. Und zen, nu we haften to pullen zhem all oops. Schweinfucker.

This is how the morning went:

We pulled up some the offending patio stones

And this is where we stacked them:

It looks like a graveyard doesn't it. We couldn't find Penny for about twenty minutes, and started to do an inscription on one of the stones.

I was so tired, after that, I started to demcompress. I had me no more jam. All I could hear was the strains of music coming from the deck, and it was "Kumbya"
...it saved my life!! No kidding. Peter, Paul and Mary have amazing life saving techniques. I would recommend them to anyone one on life support.

But, even Peter Paul and Mary couldn't get me back to life for the first 20 minutes, I was a tuckered brick unlayer.
.... Someone's Crying Lord, Kumbya, Someone's Crying Lord Kumbya...

Yes, that is me. No life left in that once pristine body of mine. My life juices were drained out. Flat as a pancake in the dirt.
....Someone's Praying Lord, Kumbya, Someone's Praying Lord Kumbya...
And that folks, is my fav pair of sweats with a big hole in the butt, and my Christmas sweatshirt.

I made my way to the pond for some water, I was dehydrated, hot and had bad hair. All I wanted was a drink and get my body back...
.... Someone's drinking Lord, Kumbya, someone's drinking Lord Kumbya...
Someone's hanging Lord, Kumbya, Someone's hanging Lord, Kumbya...
I just need me a little airing out, so Gord gave me a breather ... geez . I'm wearing my hat backwards like the cool girls do.

Someone died here Kumbya..Someone died here Kumbya.
Okay, then...Mein Herr asked me to get on the ladder and start taking all the leaves out of the eaves. Opps, that damn west wind.
Someone's drinking here, Kumbya, someone's drinking here..Kumbya

I couldn't take it anymore, I had to go up to the deck and have a glass of wine.

Someone's making an ass of herself here, Kumbya, someone's making an ass of herself here, Kumbya...

Suddenly I felt much better about myself, it was coming back to life, I felt so rehydrated. Everyone should do shots of Miracle Grow on the weekends.

The Gestapo was adamant that I pick all the apples from our apple tree. I did the best I could, but golly gee some of the apples were way to high for me to reach, and it was hard not having a body and all. So he hung me.
Kumbya...are you still singing?

And then I fell down, and my dog ate me. THE END

Someone's sleeping here, Kumbya, Someone's sleeping here Kumbya...zzzzzzzzzzzz

You gotta love PP&Mary

Thursday, August 03, 2006

I forgot Sunday supper last week

What was I thinking? It was only the run of the mill (yet homemade spaghetti). Nothing worth reciping about. We didn't have our Friday night pizza, just some snacks, and on Saturday, Gord was out all day at the Festival and by the time he got home I just laid a few burgers on the fire and called it a night, after all temp was only 100 and a fuck degrees, and I didn't want to heat up the house. So, when Sunday rolled around I needed me some real food. Not just snacks and burgers. I wanted something filling. So I made the spaghetti. Went to sleep after that like a rock. Sorta like Tony Soprano does after the does he bumps someone off.

Okay, I do have a recipe I HAVE to share, it is so good you will wet your drawers. Well maybe not. I just loved it, I made it last night and we have leftovers for tonight.

SWEET AND SOUR PINEAPPLE PORK ( I changed it to Chicken) (from Company's Coming cookbook)

(are you with me so far) okay then..I changed a few things...they make you use way to many pots etc. for a simple recipe. I don't like cleaning pots. Nosiree.

Best thing is, if you have an ELECTRIC FRY PAN use it. The electric fry pan has been my best friend all my life. I don't usually fry anything in it, but I make all my casseroles, spaghetti sauces etc in it. I can start supper early, and just adjust the timing as I go if we eat late, as we usually do. Okay, I have gone off the recipe path..

1 - can of condensed chicken broth
1/4 - cup vinegar
1/4 - cup soy sauce
1/4 - cup brown sugar (packed) ..as an aside I love demerra brown sugar.
1 - can of Pineapple "Timbits"..opps make that Tidbits..
A - generous sprinkle of garlic powder.
4 - Chicken Breasts cut up into 3/4" cubes..whatever
Freshly ground pepper
1 - Onion cut lenghwise and chopped into pieces..like you hate someone
1 - Large Red Pepper, cut into 1/2" slivers...I made mine bigger
1/4 cup soy sauce
3 - tbsp. Cornstarch

Okay, now I am not following the book again. Here is how it went down.

.. I put a litte canola oil in my frying pan, threw in the chicken pieces, and gave them a good amount of pepper. Fried them up along with the onions and peppers until they were good to go.

I made a cocktail of: (see above)
The can of chicken soup
White vinegar
Brown sugar
Generous amount of garlic
Soy Sauce
The juice from the can of pineapple
And the Cornstarch...

Mixed it all about (did the hokey pokey) and threw it in with the chicken...let it go a few minutes along with the pineapple tid bits to thicken... turned it on low and let it go until it was done...

Served it with fluffy light white rice, but it would be good with brown.

It made for a very generous serving for two people, so we are having it again tonight, whereupon I will be throwing in about 10 plump shrimp.


I have been farting around with this post for three days, and never published it. I was going to see how utterley boring I could make it, but I have re-read it 457 times and it still does not seem boring enough. Okay, you talked me into it...I'll tell you about my hair cut yesterday and the douche bag who cut it. (who gave me a freaking seniors discount I DID NOT ASK FOR! Now, I'm not saying I don't mind me a little savings here and there, but only IF I YOU GIVE YOU A COUPON. I has to be MY idea..get it? And furthermore, I will let you know when and where I want to turn into a senior citizen. It's my body, so shut the fuck up...okay?

Phew, that has been simmering on the back burner awhile now, I hope she reads my blog. I know she will not forget me, how could she, because I accidently did not leave her a tip. Oh, and yeah, you should see my hair, what is left of it. I looks like someone found my leaf blower, pointed it at my head and blew me off the deck.

It's thundering I better check outta here. I'm off find some hair extenstions.


Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Here's Gord getting ready for his annual Sunflower Festival Parade in the Excalibur.  It's his brothers car.  He rides a Sunflower Queen Candidate in the parade each year.  Well, he doesn't actually "ride" her, he takes the top off the car and she sits all queenly like on a big pillow in the back seat.  There isn't much room to sit back there, but he hasn't lost one yet.  That would be pretty funny...ha I just imagined it.

Wednesday, August 02, 2006

You know when...

You have the best idea for a blog, and you poop it out in your diaper. Yes, it's all gone bye bye. I have had way too much rest this week, I can't be bothered to let the world get to me.

Penny and I have been having a blast. Blast meaning I almost killed her with my new, mean, lean leaf blower machine. Gord has a gas powered one, but I'm hard pressed to actually getting him to use it. This summer has been so dry I can't get the forest to stop dropping it's crap in me deck. I have branches, gunk, leaves all over my patio table and deck, where I like to sits for a little quite time. So, I bought me "Big Bertha" ... and it's quite no longer. Nosiree.

I had two mishaps, on her first outing. First of all, I didn't realize how powerful it was. I was expecting it to blow softly and all ladylike because it wasn't "gas powered." Mistake. She is no girlie machine. When I got Bertha all connected and shit, I aimed it at the leaves on the deck. But, what I didn't notice was Penny was sitting on the deck amongst those leaves. I damn near blew her boots off!! HA.. She went flying down the stairs to safety on the lawn! Okay then, I realized I needed to hold on to the top handle ... Which I like to call the "aimer", which gives me more control of where I blow. (nevermind)

I powered Bertha up again, and she blew the leaves off the deck like a two bit whore. Match made in heaven. Now, I have two corner plant holders on each side of the deck with little bird houses that I nailed down on the railing, just to look pretty. Well, these bird houses were all full of leaves, and spider webs, so I thought I would take a short shot at them with BB (Big Bertha) Wellfortheloveofatwobyfour, don't you think I didn't blow the plant, and the birdhouse right off the deck!! I did! My beautiful begonia was laying on the deck and the bird house flew right off the end of the deck and landed on the lawn below. I looked around and wondered where Penny was, good lord, as I looked down from the deck she was standing a few inches where the bird house landed, with a very confused look on her face. The floor of the birdhouse was still nailed into the deck with huge staples gaping out of it, but the skeleton was at Penny's feet. I wasn't sure if it has hit her or not, so I went running down to the lawn and when I got to her, she gave me the "what in the fuck are you doing" look. I checked her head for nail holes, but nothing was visible. But I believe there will be a permanent "trust" issue between us.

Dagnabit..I can't get blogger to put up the pics...hold on I will be right back.


BR>Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting


Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

I put the shell of the bird house back on the staples that was holding the house together, but I pity the poor devil that will want to nest in there.

I had the begonia hanging in a tree..as is pic #1, but the wind was taking it's toll on it, so I moved it to the plant holder, and then I killed it. I am a murdereress.

But, the best thing is I still have Bertha, and tomorrow I'm going to take her to the cul de sac and scare little kids.

So far this week has been the best. I am so relaxed I could turn into a puddle. For once, I didn't plan ahead and make unrealistic goals to do reno's etc. on the house etc. I'm sleeping in..and in..and in and letting the day go where it may, and it's paying off. The weather has been acceptable, and we just had a great thunder shower!! 5 more days of this I can handle.