Sunday, September 12, 2010

Funny thing happened on the way to hippy chicks farm last week

I went with my SIL who just bought a fancy newer (older car). Okay it's a 2008, that's new to me. Sheila is a neat freak. Her car is immaculate. Unlike my truck which has things growing in it. I like a tidy clean house, but I could give a hairy rats ass about what I drive. If Gord doesn't clean it...it pretty well stays grimy. Like who cares....nobody visits my truck. I rarely have a passenger except the dog...therefore the hair and stale doggy breath smell. And oh yeah that green bell pepper that fell out of a grocery bag and rotted under seat.

Anyway....a couple of weeks before we went on our trip she cleaned her fancy leather seats with Armour All. Can you see where I am going with this? Armour All makes stuff slippery. As we were leaving the city every time she hit a red light my ass slipped down out of my seat belt and on to the floor. I held on for dear life until we got out of the city and on to the open road. About an hour on the road, we stopped in a little town because her fancy GPS did not want us to go where we wanted to go. As we stopped I once again pulled myself from the floor and back on to the seat. I unbuckled my seat belt and decided to go for a smoke..shutup! while she figured out why the signal was screwed up. I opened the passenger door...it's one of those really wide doors (which was apparently Armoured ALL as well. With the seat that was already slippery and the door which was like black ice....I fell to the curb. I slipped right out of her car. Like a floppy old fish. She was quite amused at all my flailing around because she had fallen out her seat a couple of weeks before. But she fell out of her car at Wal Mart.... I only fell out of it at a remote location where nobody saw me. So Ha to her.

On the way back to the city....I clenched my butt cheeks for any possible stopping motion. I was ready. Her car didn't have one of those little handles above the passenger door to hang on to either... so I just braced myself at every intersection when we got back in the city. When we finally drove up to my house I was feeling more relaxed and I invited her in for a glass of wine.

She stopped the car, we both opened our respective doors and slid out. Nobody was hurt, because by this time we had a plan.

balonie..doing sliders.

8 comments:

Poolie said...

That stuff is banned at the museum for that very reason! LOL!

Sally said...

Only you, Balonie. Well, except for the time I fell out of a car. Sometimes, I think we were separated at birth. But, of course you are MUCH older. hahahaha

Have a great day!!

Donna said...

LOLOLOLOLHahaa......ohgoodLord...I can actually "see" this happening...Hahaaaa
hughugs

Grandma K said...

that's the reason I ask hubby to not have them armor all the running boards on my truck. I slip right off those babies - and usually skin my shin!

Loved your descriptions. Been there and done that!

judemiller1 said...

That little handle above the passenger door is called the "Oh Shit" handle. You probably said that a few times?

Donna said...

ROFL!!!!!!

Joan said...

We had A plan....dumb ass I am.

Joan said...

I love the Oh shit handle...