Sunday, September 14, 2008

Hey...Bat's in me Belfry

As you have seen, my template has changed and it's still off centre, just like me. So, why am I trying to change what is meant to be? Always sweating the small stuff.

It's been a pretty good week. There was no...."It's Alway's Something" crap going on. Unless you want to call having a "BAT" in your driveway exciting. YES, a BAT! Gord was hauling out the garbage from the back of the house to the front street this morning, and when he was coming back up the driveway, he spotted a large leaf...he bent down to pick it up...and it hissed at him. It was a freaking BAT! He called me outside and said you will never guess what's out here.........and of course as I was coming down the steps with my imagination in full gear, thinking ohhh, ho ho, he's pulling a trick on me! He leads me behind my SUV...and I cautiously my head I was thinking it would be a big surprise. It's weird how many thoughts can go through your head in a few seconds, when someone won't just yell up to you in the house and say...I found a dead body in the drainage ditch next door honey. No, it was a little teenie bat. Not quite dead, but alive enough to let you know to "mind your bidness."

After Gord left to wash my truck, I had to keep watching the bat out of curiosity. I didn't even think about taking it to vet (which really did cross my mind). I watched it sitting in the hot sun in the driveway, and thought eventually it would have to get some place dark. That is my knowledge base with bats. And it did. It started to crawl underneath Gord's service van. Very slowly. I was hoping it would latch to one of the fender wells and he would drive it away when he got home and it would go to a better home. Far, far away. Apparently, he must have missed the little bugger by an inch when he left in his van later on. There I was once again.... on serious Bat Patrol. I couldn't keep my eyes off of him. Our neighbours were taking out their garbage a little later on, and I couldn't stop myself from going out and telling them..WE HAVE A BAT! Come and look at it. Some came..and shuddered, and talks of bat caves came up. So, I just checked a minute ago, and it's still there, and looks like it's deader than a I will wait till Gord gets home and maybe he will run over him this time. I can only hope.

I will be on Bat Shit Patrol for sometime....

I went for a much needed haircut on Saturday. My hair was pissing me off big time. Last week when I really needed to go for one, my stylist wasn't available, so I decided to cut off the offending parts myself. I never grow up. I have no patience. When things piss me off, I have to do something immediately. Well, Internet I made an error in judgement when I decided to cut the offending parts off. I know how to cut hair, I have done it for years, but I think I have forgotten a few essentials. I was going for a "shag" look and it ended up looking like ...Jane Fonda on drugs. Remember "Klute" she had the shag haircut I loved...and I had for many many years...but I guess I used to able to twist myself around in a mirror and cut it .... now, not so twisty in the bod ..cut bad. opps.

This brings me Saturday going to another "walk in" salon. My first impression was ...holy fuck...The receptionist had a row of bleached blonde curls from the crown of her head to her eyebrows...which was parted..neatly on each side with pitch black hair on each side. Not a bad look for a skunk. She was Russian and could hardly speak English...but being the receptionist she knew I was there to get my hair cut so we got around why the hell I was there.. As I was making the arrangements, she was frantically waiving to another lady in the back room (who was visible from the front door) and she said.... ..dis vill be yorm styveist from todayest I hope you likes her notz.

My stylist for the day, was a Summo Wrestler/Nazi. No nonsense. No talking butthead. First she butted me in the chair, and asked what style I wanted. I a very timid voice..because I was scared of her. She said ... it could be done. Then I made the fatal error, I asked her if I could change my mind....well holy hell, she hadn't even started and this seemed like such an inconvenience, but she said okay with a frown. I asked her if she could do the style like one of her co-workers had and maybe she got all ticked off because I didn't ask for her style...which was Sumo hmmmm slash Nazi.

Then I had to pay the price. She cut my hair the way I asked for it in the first place...not like the stylists. Plus, I had to hold my head "in place"... I could not move, every time my head would go a little right or left...she would cup the back of my head ..with a little force.. and straighten it out. More than once. What the hell.....So I sat like a soldier in my seat for about 15 minutes. Then, she decided to blow dry my hair...usually in these "walk in" places it's a hair cut...and then you are gone. Like McDonald's.....This was Torture. She brought out the blow dryer, and the hard round brush they use to roll your hair with. I swear to God.....she knocked my head so hard with the brush I was almost in a coma. Bang...blow dry...bang..blow dry..bang...blow dry....I could feel the lumps in my head growing. Finally when she figured she would not get me to confess to any sins I had committed to my government and to the Sumo Wrestling Community she knocked it off.

After that I went grocery shopping and I was in a haze. I had head trauma. I bought kid's cereals, and I don't even have kids.. I bought Tampax ... and I'm way over that... I don't know what I will do with that. I may light the ends and throw it over the neighbours fence and yell "incoming". Canadians don't usually do shit like that, but ..hey I has got me some trauma to the head.

I have some pic's tonight too. some interesting, some not. We had pork roast tonight. Pork roast fancy style. We had that once before with spinach, fancy cheeses and ham in it. It was really good, I bought some new small potatoes from from the market garden store down the street and I made roasted potatoes and fresh carrots with a cream sauce. It was very good. But as in the time before.... the cheese leaked out of the pork roast and got a little lost in the taste when you slice it. But I didn't really notice, because I still have head trauma.

My Penny has been much better lately. Touch wood. It seems like the arthritis has done all the damage it's going to do for now and is subsiding. Med's aren't needed half as often and she is getting back to her old self. Not to say she anywhere near where she was before this, but this is manageable. Here she is playing with her old old ball which she loves so much and is lying in her doggy bed with it between her two front legs. It's so funny to watch her when she plays with it, she uses her front legs to lift it up and play.

Just some fresh tomatoes and bread I have going on here lately.

As much as I love spring, summer, and fall, I am getting ready for winter. Spring is exciting, summer is relaxing and fall is reflective and winter has it's place even as cold as it is here, the pace becomes slower, time to think without all the distractions of summer. It can become tedious by February...but we all know March and April are around the corner, and that the cycle continues. Life...she's funny like that.


a bite of country cupcakes said...

Oh Man You are a cracker!!!
Or should I say "Batty??"
I was a Hairdresser for 13 years...I used to like the Ladies with the pencil-ed In eyebrows....If they annoyed me to much I'd wash them off at the basin!! lol!
Your dinner though looks delicious!
As for the Bat poor little bugger...If he's that bad put him out of his misery and send him on his way to Bat Heaven.
Take Care of you and your sustained injuries

Brenda said...

No matter how grumpy I am, I always have a good laugh when I come by here. I hope the knots have gone down in size and you and Penny and Gord have a wonderful week!

Dorie said...

That batty bat sounds sick. A cat will probably come along and nab him- eeewww, but gets him off your property. Glad to see Miss Penny looking so comfortable!

Donna said...

I have been entertained, throughly....again!!Haahahaaaa....most days, I can't Wait to see what's been happening in your world....Happy day sweetie...hope the traumas...subside...hahahahaaaa...hughugs

cocoabean said...

I wouldn't have noticed the problem with your template if you hadn't mentioned it. It's just a size thing, try finding the size of the side bars in the template and making them equal.