Tuesday, September 23, 2008

A sight for sore eyes

Last night we had at least three big thunderstorms roll through the city. Around 4:00 AM...Penny jumped off the waterbed. I was awake because of all the lightning, thunder and rain pounding down. I knew she had to go down and take a piss. Goin..down for her is not a problem, but she can't get back up the stairs. I made her wait until the storm abated somewhat and let her out. She dashed out like she had a something up...or in her ass....heh. I stood outside on the deck in my silky nightgown...so drafty...I can't even tell you ...waiting for her to finish and pick her up. The sky was so bright it was almost red, with all the different systems coming in I could actually see her wandering around the yard that time of night.

So, just as another storm was approaching...and the lightning was getting closer, I ran down the stairs and picked her up and started back up the stairs...(I must take pic's..so you will understand how difficult this is). Anyway, I started up two stairs and my silky nightgown got caught between my big frickin feet. I stumbled, and had to go backwards down the stairs with a 30 pound dog in my arms. I set her down and came up with a plan. I had to do this pretty damn fast because the wind was coming up. I hiked up "my silky nightgown" around my waist..pulled it up very tightly and tied it around my waist. Picked up the wet dog, and climbed up eight stairs half nakid. Now this would only something you would see on UTube had it been caught on tape...a woman carrying a dog, with her nightgown tied around her waist, up a flight of stairs. Ahhh..well, my privates needed a little airing out anyway.

So, now I'm thinking...this might be challenge in winter. Do I want to hike up my nightgown when it's 40 below if she has to go potty in the middle of the night? I don't really think my "privates" need to be frost bitten... mind you, they aren't used as much as they were when we were younger, BUT I don't want to get frost bite on my ass!! I need to sit on it all day!!

I have to come up with a plan for winter. Can anyone help me out here?

These are the stairs going up the deck...the only picture I could find...so you can see winter will be a problem. Imagine this area full of snow. I have to pick her up right at the bottom step.

I need a puppy lift.


A Bite of Country Cupcakes said...

Joan! Oh My ...I am speechless!!
Lol!!...Oh,Um ...LMAO!!!!

Donna said...

Oh Goodness! A cold tush is Never a good thing!hahahaaa.....How about a doggie lift over the side? Train her to jump into a basket?? Maybe??haha....hughugs

Brenda said...

I like Donna's idea, get Gord to put you a pulley out there. :-)

Did the neighbors stand outside with cameras?

Andrea (Off Her Cork) said...

Flannel pants. Have a pair handy to toss on when you are about to head outside. :D

poet said...

how about building a ramp?

Joan said...

Thanks for the ideas...Poet suggested a ramp and we have been considering it.... Gord is going to get some lumber this weekend. But, he's not a carpenter...so between all the swearing, measuring, and totally overthinking the project, it might be easier to let the dog shit in front of the door. You do..remember when he put the patio stones on the deck? I can't go through that again. I hanged myself from the tallest tree at that time, and I can do it again if he starts another project involving wood or cement.

Mary Lou said...

LOLOLOLOLOLOL Oh the visual!!