Tuesday, August 09, 2005

How can you tell I am short of material?

Before you read the nonsense stolen material from the internet, I would like to make a special plea to all blogger's in the hemisphere...how in the fuck do I get rid of Cartman? I need to know, and I need to know now! I have done everything I know how, plus used suggestions by some of my viewers...I can't get rid of that son of bitch!!...I'm mad now. I have deleted his code and put the new code in..I have republished and republished until my finger were numb and my new pic is in my profile...but his stinky little ass keeps showing up in the blog..over and over. I'm going insane I am. I had visions of making my blog a little more "refined" ya know..but his chubby arse is giving me a bad rep.and I have my rep. to think of. It just goes to show ya, something you do that you think is so funny at the moment..can come around and bite your ass ...over and over... I don't know what I was thinking.

How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb?

1. Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned out bulb?
2. Border Collie: Just one. And then I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code.
3. Dachshund: You know I can't reach that stupid lamp!
4. Rottweiler: Make me.
5. Boxer: Who cares? I can still play with my squeaky toys in the dark.
6. Lab: Oh, me, me!!!!! Pleeeeeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I? Pleeeeeeeeeze, please, please, please!
7. German Shepherd: I'll change it as soon as I've led these people from the dark, check to make sure I haven't missed any, and make just one more perimeter patrol to see that no one has tried to take advantage of the situation.
8. Jack Russell Terrier: I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the walls and furniture.
9. Havenese: Light bulb? I'm sorry, but I don't see a light bulb!
10. Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.
11. Chihuahua: Yo quiero Taco Bulb. Or "We don't need no stinking light bulb."
12. Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares?
13. Australian Shepherd: First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a little circle...
14. Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border Collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.

How many cats does it take to change a light bulb?

Cats do not change light bulbs. People change light bulbs. So, the real question is:
"How long will it be before I can expect some light, some dinner, and a massage?"

And one more...How many CARTMAN'S does it take to PISS ME OFF..just one MOFO...

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