Sunday, March 15, 2009

I gather up junk...therefore I am.

Taking junk out, rearranging the junk from within. I was perfectly happy with all the junk stored away out of sight, and now it's all sitting in the middle of three rooms downstairs for the world to see.

If I thought it was hard purging the upstairs, then I have another thing coming, because it is downstairs ... in these rooms where past memories live. I have all my mom's stuff and Gord has his dad's stuff. It doesn't take that much room, but I can't figure a way to make it part of this house. It was in her house and her stuff. ...I sit on the bed downstairs...fingers tapping...head aching...and don't know what to do with stuff I will never use. It's in boxes and suitcases. I have taken everything from my mom's stuff out that I thought would keep her memory alive. It's sits in my wall unit, and in pictures on my walls and in photo albums. Gord's dad had huge box of "vespers" tapes of Lutheran songs that were sang in church that he taped. I don't know what to do with them. Gord was going to donate them back to the church, but we tried to play a few on his dad's old tape machine, and they were brittle and just kept on breaking. Soon there will be no one who remembers the "Vespers"...and maybe I can lay them to rest with the rest of the stuff. Guilt...........I hope when we die they throw it all out, except for my Ricky Nelson autographed picture. He has to live on..:) and maybe the pencil drawing Hippychick did of me when I was still a babe. ....and let's see what's hard.

I have finished cleaning and redoing the downstairs bath and laundry room. There is so much grit and grime from sanding and painting I don't think it will ever "ungrit" it. Next weekend... either I toss shit...or store it. It's going to get done. Because I'm so sick of this mess. So, next weekend it just cleaning and nudging...nudging stuff out the door that I have a hard time parting with.

Plus spring has sprung, and I don't want to be farting around down in the bowels of my house. I just took all the garbage to the street for garbage day tomorrow, plus I loaded up my truck with stuff to take to Salvation Army/Value Village, both will get some. It's starting to "echo" in here.

I haven't even started with Gord's bookwork for income tax come the end of April. I need a month off of work just to catch up around here. OH OH poor pitiful me!! jeez I sound like a wuss. But spring is in the air, I can smell it; and that's all that's giving me some extra umph! I envy HippyChick now that she has retired. It's becoming obvious to me, there is a time you should hang up your skates and do something else. Or at least take time off to regroup.

Bloggie Awards!... It's the academy awards for bloggers!! The results were in today for the best in different categories. I'm so happy for Pioneer Woman, she really has made a name for herself just by being real and a little wacko. Plus smart.

I had a bad belly at lunch and didn't hardly eat a bite, but now I'm starving. Lets see if I can make it happen at suppertime.

And please....I am just whining, no need to feel sorry for me, I do enough of that by myself. I need drugs. Any suggestions. I sleep fine, but my head worries all day......


Brenda said...

I start my chantix tomorrow but they say that puts an edge on,,,maybe something different.

I can't throw things away Miz Joan, I grieve just thinking about it.

Nicole said...

Sometimes you just need a good whining post to make you feel better. After writing it all down you feel lighter and able to get things done.

Sally said...

We just cannot keep everything! And, it's amazing how fast it all piles up. When I moved from a big house into a little condo, I gave away, got rid of so much stuff. Now, I'm back in a house and have way too much again! At least last week, I went through all the closets and took a huge load to Goodwill. I mean if you don't wear something in two or three years, why keep it!

But, yes, the things that belonged to my parents were the hardest to decide about. :(