Monday, December 03, 2007

Slim is still not dressed

He will sit there nakid until the weekend, because I just don't have the time to drag up his Christmas clothes from the basement. It's dark by the time I get home, and I'm always in a hurry trying to get my shit together. But he is settling in. Gettin the feel of the place. Little does he know, he will be moving across the room, poor thang. I hope he doesn't drop all his phony needles with the stress of it all. I might just have to give him a hug before the big move.

My desktop, didn't like the move to the office downstairs. She is such a bitch!! Before I went to bed last night I went down to turn her off, and she was screaming....."my memory..my memory...I have lost my memory!! Well, I tried to settle her down and clicked her head (desktop)...wrong thing to do, because apparently that is where her memory is stored. Not unlike us humans. It's all in the frontal lobe. She was waving me bye-bye, and there was nothing I could to stop her from slowly fading away. And she couldn't even shut herself down. There is no 911 number to call when you oldest best friend is having an incident, so I manually "put her down." It was very sad.

But to be honest, I think I know what her problem is. She was so jealous of my laptop which was now #1, she got depressed. Shit like that happens! I went back down to the office tonight and tried to fire her up. She came back up slowly as usual and stuck tongue out at me. SHE is such a whiner. All she wanted to do was scare me. She knows another computer is not in the budget.

Isn't my life sad. I make friends with plastic Christmas trees, and old computers. I don't even want to go in the basement and see the havoc my old tree has generated now that "Slim" is the centre of attention. It's probably a nightmare. She probably farted on my nativity scene the little minx. I almost said bastard, but it just sounds so ugly...I'm going to stop that.

Is there a "rainbow bridge" for old computers and Christmas trees?

I'm sure that is how "bag ladies" start collecting. That will me in a few years and I will probably hear them talking to me...and I won't have any teeth. The conversation will be da da dimwittydo..
But hey, I do that now.

I will be phoning the Salvation Army, and get them to pick up all the dead, but haunting relics in this house....just to stop the fighting!!!

5 comments:

JUST A MOM said...

oh look at you replacing stuff all the time .... Hope you keep warm adn havea great week.

Brenda said...

Poor old desktop, she'll keep giving you grief unless pamper her every so often.

Dorie said...

Awww geee- Desktop sounds like an old scifi/horror movie called "The Demon Seed" about a Wang Word Processor that decided he wanted to be a real boy. 'Puters are smarter than us anyhow. It's good to clean their cache once in awhile or they'll plot against us at night!

Joan said...

Thanks Jaye...and take care yourself too.

Brenda...I was so broke when my HP hit the boards a few years ago, I got the cheapest Dell I could find, and it's showing.

Dorie...I think I remember that movie, the word "wang" got my attention. LOL.. I defraged, decached, deleted just about everything...and she still is a crab ass. Temp files are gone...I think it is Dell Dementia. But Santa is coming I might just get lucky.

Southern to the bone. said...

Love your Christmasy look here, Ms. Joan! And, your spirit; keep it going! :)