Friday, April 10, 2009

The blind leading the blind

We had an interesting yet scary experience this afternoon.

The smoke alarm went off.

Gord: (sitting on the can) yells out, "take a towel and and wave it in front of it and make it stop."

Joan: I am waving at it, but it won't stop!

Gord: (getting his pants halfway back on) dashes to the hallway and watches me wave.

Joan: It won't stop!... It always stops, but I don't know why it is ringing because nothing is happening here.

Gord: Go down in the bottom level to see if there is any smoke.

Joan: I'm on it. I run down two flights of stairs; and there is nothing. Sometimes high humidity sets it off, but it wasn't humid. I come running back up with my observations.

Gord: 'Well, we got to stop this thing" was blowing out our ear drums...I have never heard it ring that loud.

He got a kitchen chair and put in the hallway so he could reach the smoke detector and was trying to disconnect it. (It's the wired in kind, not battery operated). Finally after 5 minutes of deafening ringing he got it disconnected.

Joan: It's still ringing.

Gord: Well, what the fuck!

He looks down on the hallway, and saw the Carbon Monoxide alarm that is in a wall plug, and said it must be that.

Joan: It's not ringing...but the sound was so loud ...air raid sirens man...I can't even tell where it was coming from. So I pressed the reset button, and the ringing did not stop, so I took the alarm out of the outlet and put in on the floor. And things kept on ringing. It was unplugged, so all should be good. Sirens abounded.

Gord: Take the CO detector outside, and lets see where its coming from.

Joan: Grabbed the little bastard and went running out the patio doors. The ringing in the house stopped, the ringing outside did not. This thing was so loud you couldn't discern where the noise was coming made your ears bleed. So, yes it was coming from the Carbon Monoxide detector....then we had to make a decision...were we being gassed ... or not? The only way we could turn it off was by taking the auxiliary battery out of it and putting it back in. OMG the noise was incredible. I thought for sure we would die from the noise. I went through a few things I knew about Carbon Monoxide poisoning and asked him if he was dizzy, or he had flu like symptoms, and he said no...and neither did I. I checked with Penny, and she was chasing around balls in the house, so it didn't look like she was in any danger. I went around the house trying to smell smoke...ahem assehole...carbon monoxide doesn't have an odour.

So we plugged it back in, and turned the furnace on high heat just to see if the monitor would go off again. That would have been the only source of carbon monoxide.

Gord: I don't feel lightheaded.

Joan: My heart seems to beating alot.

Gord: It's supposed to.

Joan: I'm going on the internet.

Gord: Not again!

Joan: No, I'm taking the model number off the detector to see if I can find the manual for it that I threw out after we installed it.

Gord: Okay, but I was thinking you were just going to say farewell to your blogger friends...

Joan: Keep it up....or you are going to be picking up your teeth with your broken arm! I'm busy saving lives.

Gord: Who tells me he has a shit pile of stuff to at the little house we are renovating, is leaving.....leaving me here with a deadly chemical that will kill me and the dog. Although he did say the monitor was not working properly. But still!

Joan: Gets on the internet. And finds the model number and all the specs for the monitor. Scares herself a little bit...but doesn't that always happen when you google shit? Turns out that the monitor will only go it did...when it was taken off the power source. And then there were instuctions on how to take the battery out and put it back in. Which we did. But, my question did it get out the power source in the hallway wall? Well, it took me 2 minutes to figure that out after I read that....sonofabitch....

I had just taken out one of those pellets that you use in your dishwasher and peeled away the plastic coating and was about to throw in the dishwasher, when it broke apart and landed on my kitchen rug in front of the sink. It was everywhere. I wanted to make sure the dog didn't come and start licking up stuff, so I took the rug (which is pretty heavy).... and shook the rug in front of the sink to get rid of anything in there, then took the rug, and placed ... no shoved it in the hallway beside the CO detector. I guess I disconnected it, because it was just after that all hell broke loose.

And Gord just came home , and our ice maker in the freezer has gone to shit and there is frozen water (ice) everyfuckingwhere.

Who called this "Good Friday?"

And I'm not kidding...I't always something!!!!!!!!!


im2qt2kr said...

Hi, I'm a friend of Poolie and several others you read. Your entry is too funny. My detector went off, but when I looked for it, it wasn't in the plug. I hunted all over to track it down, but then I noticed the noise went down a few decibals...I walk in the living room and my two puggies had pulled it out of the wall, I guess the noise scared them, so their remedy, lay down on top of it! haaaaaa..

Brenda said...

Every time I think I've had the worse day ever, I come here and read about yours and feel better cause mine wasn't nearly that bad. Or funny.


Poolie said...

We must share some DNA or something. Wanna borrow my clown shoes?

Anonymous said...

Damn! Good thing ya didn't get injured by the monohydrogen dioxide...


Nicole said...

Oh Joan! What a day. But reading about your day makes me feel better about mine ;-)

judemiller1 said...

My Good Grief--you certainly have an interesting life!!
P.S. I always get scared when I Google something like that or...a medical symptom..Google always tells me I have a life threatening condition.

Donna said...

Hahahahaaaaa...I'm SO glad Gord isn't having to pick his teeth up with his broken hand...LOLOLOLHahahaaaa...OMG!!!
I'm gonna remember that one!!!HAHahahahaaa....(((HUG)))

Joan said...

Hiya im2qt2kr.....thanks for stopping in. I can't believe it didn't blow their ear drums clean off. Man it was loud.

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