Sunday, December 04, 2005

Goodwinter day to you all.

This is one of my favorite graphics.."Father Christmas." So I made him my Christmas Card of the season. I've spent 3 stinking hours editing and re-editing it, but I think I got it done the way I wanted it. So, with bated breath I printed the first copy. Of course, my frigging printer started to give me grief, with a message "one of your $2,345.00 HP cartridges has caused an error, please remove it and replace it with one worth $3,345.00. Please do not try to print more that 10 or more colour pictures with this ink cartridge, or you will be sorry."..and we will get richer, much richer. Screw them. I had two cartridges in there with levels showing there was approximately 1/4 of the tank left. Bloody liars!! I wrecked very expensive photo paper because I didn't believe the warning message. I really thought they were fucking with my mind and just wanted me to put in a new cartridge. Apparently they have a coding device implanted in the cartridges that beams back to HP telling them, "some sucker wants to print there own Christmas cards." Then HP, sends a message back to the printer telling it to draw big fat ugly lines on your new expensive photo paper, and make you buy more cartridges. They got ya by the balls!! Now I remember why I quit computer scrapbooking, I destroyed an entire forest with all the paper I have threw out. GD capitalist pigs!

I had a surprise call last night after Attitude Adjustment Hour. Yessss, Ms. Special K needed a "raisin fix." I was her man..well make that woman, but you can't tell now a day, because of all that hair growing on my face. Do you know she has her beer delivered?...Yes, I'm not kidding. And she drank a whole 2-4 whilst we were talking LOL.. (ducking). I was cooking (sort of) while we were talking trying to get some supper happening. Well Kat, the beef stir fry turned out a little overdone, but I didn't want to miss a minute of our conversation. By the time I was finished it looked like a pile of doggy poo. But, when you added the rice to it looked acceptable. We inhaled it pretty fast, so it didn't really matter. If any Chinese people would have seen it, they would have flogged me with chopsticks.

I was going to do Brenda's meme today, but I couldn't find it because her sidebar is gone.

I am making porcupine meatballs tonight. It smells marvy. My stomach is growling, but Gord's going to be a smidge late tonight. It's worth waiting for.

What is the protocol?

I took Ms. Penny out for a walk today, (wind chill was like 1000 degrees below Celsius). She is so gay. She lifts her leg up when going for a whiz..she is a girl dog.. and she should be squatting like all the rest of us! I always carry a SAFEWAY bag with me in case of the "dump." So, today she found a huge dump that wasn't removed by it's very careless owner, and dumped on top of it. So, the question I have, is, do I just remove her dump, or do I remove the whole package? I didn't have too long to ponder the question, as I was turning into a popsicle. I made a management decision, and decided to only take the soft stuff, because the other shit was embedded in the ice. My job was done. But, what I hadn't factored into my decision was that some used SAFEWAY bags have holes in the bottom. Fortheloveofacommercialgiant, could they not perceive that after we remove their over priced groceries from the bag, we need to recycle it to get our monies worth. Make them stronger Man!!! Once I picked up the crap, took the air out of the bag, tied it up and "sure as god made little green apples," it leaked out. Now I am cold and smell like shit. It followed me around the block. I didn't know where to put it, and because my hands were freezing, I tried to keep part of my hand in my pocket, but the shit bag was hanging out. I made a speedy trek home. Me, my dog, and leaky bag full of steaming shit. Some days are better than others.

The rest of my day was full of chores, I had to get the GST remittance out for the stinking government, start a new batch of wine for Christmas, clean the fish tank, and get my Christmas Cards ready in the computer. Oh, yeah..get a blog out for a change.

Special K and I were just talking last night and were mentioning that it will almost a whole year that I have been blogging. Hot damn. A whole year! I have never had the attention span do something for a whole year...and well, I did! I think I started sometime after Christmas, but I will have to look it up.

Gord just got home...with of our new tenants gave us a special bottle of Italian wine, along with a huge bag of (hot) Italian pretzels. I love his pretzels, I can smell them baking, just a few doors from my office. They are so crisp and tasty. They are boiled and then baked in his brand new oven. This last batch tasted like fennel seed. It was wonderful. First of all I didn't like it, because it tasted too much like licorice, but man, it is addictive. I can't get enough of it. He makes many other flavours. I think I have mentioned this before in another blog, but's sooooo good. Nothing more annoying is having an ole raisin repeating herself.

Okay, time for me to VAMOUSSE ahhh spell check that... that's french for 'I'm outta here..I don't really know. But, I'm gone to fetch a moose.


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