I bet you thought I was going to bitch about, but I'm not. It looks a whole lot better than the birds nest I had happening on my head. I'm a wash and wear kinda girl. I don't have time to mess with it. And when it starts messing with me I get troubled.
Troubled.
So, how is everyone?
I had a good weekend. Got all the toilet stains out, plucked out a stray gray hair out of my eyebrow, did the laundry, made the dog play with me, and spent the major part of the afternoon doing bookwork for the business. Made sweet and sour pork tenderloin pieces along with basmati rice and a nice fresh salad. And that's it. Opps..now we are going to have strawberries and ice-cream in a few minutes. Well, not real ice-cream...low fat ice-cream. That ice-cream is so so low in fat...it should be called white ice. But it's not bad considering.
It's still so cold out here you can't really sit out on the deck at night. And winter is just a few months away. It's very weird. My raspberries still haven't ripened. They should have done that three weeks ago! All my flowering plants are staying dormant. They bloom, but they need the heat and the sun because they don't have any vibrant colours they usually have.
Plus we are having another week of rain predicted. Lord, we are drenched.
Off to eat some low fat ice-cream. And go to bed and cuddle up with my two best friends.
I know, I am boring. Yikes I wish I could get a thoughtful sentence out, but it's one of those days again my friends.
I'll be checking in on your blogs next week.
Sunday, July 19, 2009
Thursday, July 16, 2009
Yesterday we had a dilemma Dumb & Dumber
Just as I was sitting down at the computer, Gord was sitting down at the TV behind me. I had just logged into blogger and thinking, wow I really feel like posting today.
No sooner was I logged on, I heard the words of doom. "How come the BIG TV doesn't have a connection to satellite and the little TV in the kitchen does? Well, I knew it was over right there and then. They are hooked together, they should operate as one. We pulled everything apart, I went down into the basement and fiddlefucked with the cables. We had a few heated moments, because it just didn't make sense that one TV worked and the other one THE BIG ONE...had a pretty little logo dancing around the screen saying "you have no signal."
It was taunting us.
And the TV's were about 10 feet apart, yet in different rooms. The little one is on the counter in my kitchen, and THE BIG ONE is in the TV room adjacent to it. You can't have too many TV's packed in a 3 square foot area. But, they both serve a separate purpose... ah huh. One is for when I cook in the kitchen and the other one is when we go around the corner to another open area room and watch THE BIG TV. Got it? I didn't think so. Nevermind.
We did the old fart thing, changed up all the batteries in the remotes, I went down in the basement and got up on the dryer in the laundry room so I could reach the electrical panel to seek out a problem I had no idea about. Gord, meanwhile was on the floor in the TV room, disconnecting and reconnecting shit he didn't have a clue about. While I was yelling up from downstairs...IS IT ON NOW? ... He would reply WHAT...forfucksakes. TURN THE OTHER TV DOWN SO YOU CAN HEAR ME!
Finally about an hour later, I asked him call his brother who installed the TV. He didn't want to because you, you know...pride. Finally he did. As he was sitting in a little hole behind the TV I handed him his Cell phone and he called his brother. His brother immediately told him his settings on his remote control had been tampered with.
Someone's big ass had sat on the remote and changed it from Video 1 to Video 2...or it could be the other way around I don't know. But hey, we were back in the 20th century.
I pride myself to be computer literate, because I come from and age where most people thought I was nuts. I had a commodore 64 man. And upgraded myself to this point. But holy smokes, give me a TV remote, I am lost. I guess you have to really use stuff like that to know it.
We rarely rent movies, and when we do, awwwwgeez it's always...where is that piece of paper where I wrote the instructions. I know it's so simple...so simple! Yet if you don't do it on a on going basis, you forget.
But I don't think I will forget this. We seriously thought it was a problem will our Bell dish. That is how dumb we are.
I knocked on both of our heads last night...and they seemed to be hollow. Like a over ripe cantaloupe. Past it's prime.
I got a new computer at work today. It's been a very interesting day uploading all my files to the new Vista computer from my old XP. Actually Vista makes it very easy. My old computer is probably still chugging up the files to the new one as we speak. Good grief ..talk about slow. I now have all the new bells and whistles. And yes, I know most people don't like Vista, but I needed a new computer because mine holds all the network files and it was bogged down tighter than a fart.
Now, if I post a blog from work it will be so fast, you might not even be able to see it.
See how that works?
So, if I post and I don't get any comments, I will know that my computer is just to freaking fast.
Yes, I am an asshole. But we all know that.
No sooner was I logged on, I heard the words of doom. "How come the BIG TV doesn't have a connection to satellite and the little TV in the kitchen does? Well, I knew it was over right there and then. They are hooked together, they should operate as one. We pulled everything apart, I went down into the basement and fiddlefucked with the cables. We had a few heated moments, because it just didn't make sense that one TV worked and the other one THE BIG ONE...had a pretty little logo dancing around the screen saying "you have no signal."
It was taunting us.
And the TV's were about 10 feet apart, yet in different rooms. The little one is on the counter in my kitchen, and THE BIG ONE is in the TV room adjacent to it. You can't have too many TV's packed in a 3 square foot area. But, they both serve a separate purpose... ah huh. One is for when I cook in the kitchen and the other one is when we go around the corner to another open area room and watch THE BIG TV. Got it? I didn't think so. Nevermind.
We did the old fart thing, changed up all the batteries in the remotes, I went down in the basement and got up on the dryer in the laundry room so I could reach the electrical panel to seek out a problem I had no idea about. Gord, meanwhile was on the floor in the TV room, disconnecting and reconnecting shit he didn't have a clue about. While I was yelling up from downstairs...IS IT ON NOW? ... He would reply WHAT...forfucksakes. TURN THE OTHER TV DOWN SO YOU CAN HEAR ME!
Finally about an hour later, I asked him call his brother who installed the TV. He didn't want to because you, you know...pride. Finally he did. As he was sitting in a little hole behind the TV I handed him his Cell phone and he called his brother. His brother immediately told him his settings on his remote control had been tampered with.
Someone's big ass had sat on the remote and changed it from Video 1 to Video 2...or it could be the other way around I don't know. But hey, we were back in the 20th century.
I pride myself to be computer literate, because I come from and age where most people thought I was nuts. I had a commodore 64 man. And upgraded myself to this point. But holy smokes, give me a TV remote, I am lost. I guess you have to really use stuff like that to know it.
We rarely rent movies, and when we do, awwwwgeez it's always...where is that piece of paper where I wrote the instructions. I know it's so simple...so simple! Yet if you don't do it on a on going basis, you forget.
But I don't think I will forget this. We seriously thought it was a problem will our Bell dish. That is how dumb we are.
I knocked on both of our heads last night...and they seemed to be hollow. Like a over ripe cantaloupe. Past it's prime.
I got a new computer at work today. It's been a very interesting day uploading all my files to the new Vista computer from my old XP. Actually Vista makes it very easy. My old computer is probably still chugging up the files to the new one as we speak. Good grief ..talk about slow. I now have all the new bells and whistles. And yes, I know most people don't like Vista, but I needed a new computer because mine holds all the network files and it was bogged down tighter than a fart.
Now, if I post a blog from work it will be so fast, you might not even be able to see it.
See how that works?
So, if I post and I don't get any comments, I will know that my computer is just to freaking fast.
Yes, I am an asshole. But we all know that.
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
It's still raining
But I caught a rainbow, before it started up again.I started a blog a few hours ago, and ditched it...lord I was whining. So a took a few hours off, watched the rain, had a really good supper and did an attitude adjustment. Sometimes I let the small stuff get to me. Then you have to look at the big picture. Which I am doing right now.
Penny is laying at my feet, Gord is snoring in bed, and the rain is falling ever so gently outside. So, whatever my bitches were before seem so insignificant now.
I love the rainy nights. It calms my soul. WHAT... you didn't think I had one? Well I do. You will see me in heaven. I will be the one selling balonie sandwiches at the gate. I got an in with Saint Pete.
Enough of this bullshit....I gotta go to bed ... another storm is coming and I got to get off of here.
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Still can't get in the grove
For lack of anything new in my life. I am going to take a page out of Mimi Smartypant's blog to make up for it. She sort of made up a list of stuff she likes and dislikes. Mimi slays me. She has a wicked sense of humour and is a really good writer.
UNSEXY THINGS I MAY HAVE ALLEGEDY SAID DURING SEXY TIMES:
My thumb hurts.
What is the dog doing down there?
Where are you?
I have a cramp in my leg.
Turn off that fucking cel phone!
That's better.
THINGS I WILL ALWAYS WATCH, NO MATTER HOW CHEESY OR POORLY CRAFTED THE MEDIA:
All My Children
Jon & Kate
Friends
Anything on HGTV
American Idol
Two and half men
CNN news
WHAT I SAY TO THE DOG WHEN WE’RE ALL ALONE:
How's my stinkerwinker?
Time for beddieweddie.
Pennypoops here's your kibblewibble.
Let me see your footsie wootsie...while trying to clip her nails and she is trying eat my face!
Give momma a big kiss (while I hold my nose with a clothes pin) her breath smells like pond scum.
Where is: her balls...well not really her own balls because she's a girl..heh...
Where is beigie, where is bluie, where is yellow belly, where is orangie...you see where I'm going here, they are all the same type of ball with a different colour. It's just sick. But she is so smart she will bring any colour you ask her to.
I sing a song ..Penny Penny Bo Penny, Penny....and go right through the whole damn thing. It's very sad. But she loves nothing better than to hear me sing. I can't say that for anyone else.
People, this is my life. Send money.
UNSEXY THINGS I MAY HAVE ALLEGEDY SAID DURING SEXY TIMES:
My thumb hurts.
What is the dog doing down there?
Where are you?
I have a cramp in my leg.
Turn off that fucking cel phone!
That's better.
THINGS I WILL ALWAYS WATCH, NO MATTER HOW CHEESY OR POORLY CRAFTED THE MEDIA:
All My Children
Jon & Kate
Friends
Anything on HGTV
American Idol
Two and half men
CNN news
WHAT I SAY TO THE DOG WHEN WE’RE ALL ALONE:
How's my stinkerwinker?
Time for beddieweddie.
Pennypoops here's your kibblewibble.
Let me see your footsie wootsie...while trying to clip her nails and she is trying eat my face!
Give momma a big kiss (while I hold my nose with a clothes pin) her breath smells like pond scum.
Where is: her balls...well not really her own balls because she's a girl..heh...
Where is beigie, where is bluie, where is yellow belly, where is orangie...you see where I'm going here, they are all the same type of ball with a different colour. It's just sick. But she is so smart she will bring any colour you ask her to.
I sing a song ..Penny Penny Bo Penny, Penny....and go right through the whole damn thing. It's very sad. But she loves nothing better than to hear me sing. I can't say that for anyone else.
People, this is my life. Send money.
Thursday, July 09, 2009
It rained so hard today...
The cars parked in front of my building at work were flooded.
I took pictures with my cel phone, but I have no idea how to take them off.
Note to self: read the manual.
Sorry for not posting too much anymore, but I'm in a slump. Or a dump?
You choose.
I took pictures with my cel phone, but I have no idea how to take them off.
Note to self: read the manual.
Sorry for not posting too much anymore, but I'm in a slump. Or a dump?
You choose.
Monday, July 06, 2009
It's summer in the city
I spent a lot of time doing yard work during my brief two day vacation...not counting Canada Day and the weekend. Stat's never count, nor do weekends.
I never lifted my head off my pillow before 11:00 AM all five days. I am new woman! Other than the unfortunate shopping trip where I lost my trousers ... it went well.
The back 40 still looks like a dog's breakfast because it was reseeded and we can't mow it for another week or so. But everything else is coming along. I really resent summer, because you bust your ass trying to get all the crap winter has thrown at it back into shape, and then it's fall? WTF, whose idea of a good time is that? Not mine brother.
I stained my deck, and stained my new picnic table. Gord and I put it together last Sunday. And I am proud to report no one got hit on the head with a 2x4. We acted like adults. I was close to taking him out a few times, but I held my wicked tongue between my clenched teeth, and ran up the stairs to the house for about the 2,345th. time to get a different screwdriver, hammer, measuring tape, a pencil for marking the 2x4 I had being eying up if he was going to give me grief, the table instructions, a cold drink, .... but then I the was the go-fer and he was da man who built it. And he did a good job. No 2x4 for him, this time. He even put the bench seat back a little further than most picnic tables. I hate trying to wiggle into those things. Now we have lots of room. In case I grow. And it is spaced far enough so Penny can jump up on the bench and on to the table. THE TABLE, you say, yes the table..we don't eat on it. Penny loves sitting up there. I put the table out in the garden today, and we can sit there and she has her kibble and snack, playtime and drinks out of the pond when she is thristy. I just love it.
Hey, she's old, I spoil the crap out of her. I'm just thankful she can run around again and have fun. No more pain.
Just a few pic's of the on going struggle. The pond is almost good to go. I will take more of that later.
Notice...I forgot to stain the edge....fart, now I will have to get the paint can back out and the brush...oy so much work of one edge.
I never lifted my head off my pillow before 11:00 AM all five days. I am new woman! Other than the unfortunate shopping trip where I lost my trousers ... it went well.
The back 40 still looks like a dog's breakfast because it was reseeded and we can't mow it for another week or so. But everything else is coming along. I really resent summer, because you bust your ass trying to get all the crap winter has thrown at it back into shape, and then it's fall? WTF, whose idea of a good time is that? Not mine brother.
I stained my deck, and stained my new picnic table. Gord and I put it together last Sunday. And I am proud to report no one got hit on the head with a 2x4. We acted like adults. I was close to taking him out a few times, but I held my wicked tongue between my clenched teeth, and ran up the stairs to the house for about the 2,345th. time to get a different screwdriver, hammer, measuring tape, a pencil for marking the 2x4 I had being eying up if he was going to give me grief, the table instructions, a cold drink, .... but then I the was the go-fer and he was da man who built it. And he did a good job. No 2x4 for him, this time. He even put the bench seat back a little further than most picnic tables. I hate trying to wiggle into those things. Now we have lots of room. In case I grow. And it is spaced far enough so Penny can jump up on the bench and on to the table. THE TABLE, you say, yes the table..we don't eat on it. Penny loves sitting up there. I put the table out in the garden today, and we can sit there and she has her kibble and snack, playtime and drinks out of the pond when she is thristy. I just love it.
Hey, she's old, I spoil the crap out of her. I'm just thankful she can run around again and have fun. No more pain.
Just a few pic's of the on going struggle. The pond is almost good to go. I will take more of that later.
Notice...I forgot to stain the edge....fart, now I will have to get the paint can back out and the brush...oy so much work of one edge. 
Thursday, July 02, 2009
This is what I did on my vacation..Day 1
by: Joan Balonie Grade 3
Slept in until 10:30.
Had a shower, made coffee.
The milk I poured in my coffee was "off"..had to use creamer....fucked up my morning.
Had lunch - uneventful. Watched an episode of "All My Children"...Told Erica to kiss my ass, and turned it off.
Went to home Depot to buy stain to paint my deck and new picnic table. AND to buy light bulbs!!
Someone help me out here, I know I don't get out that much, but WHAT IN THE HELL? You can't buy a light bulb anymore. All they had were these energy efficient screwy looking things. Plus some round creepy ugly ones. I bought a whole bunch of my favorite (pastel pink) 60 watt bulbs there sometime this winter....now they were ALL GONE. Where will I get my ambient light bulbs from. I hate nothing more than bright lights. I have dimmer switches in every room in the house. But the problem is with my 4,567 lamps I own. I'm a lamp junkie. And with the price of one of these energy efficient ass hole bulbs I will be out on the street driving my shopping cart full of carpet remnants...blubbering... hip dee dee da huh.
I was really pissed off. So, I went to Canadian Tire, surely they would have a regular light bulb, even if it wasn't a 60 watt Pastel Pink bulb. I found 4-60 watt regular bulbs wayyyyyyyyy down under a bunch of shit on the shelves. I think they were trying to hide them. This was really putting a dark cloud on my holiday I tell ya.
It was getting too late to do any painting, so I just kept on going. Finally I ended up at Zellers and started to look for some clothes.
I didn't have any plans to go clothing shopping today, because if I knew that, I would not have gone into a store dressed like I was. I was dressed to go hardware shopping...not for clothes.
I was wearing an over sized black hoodie sweatshit, blue very light weight sweatpants that have a tie string..not elastic at the waist (wait..that will tie in to another story) blue waffle weave socks and peacock blue lacy looking flat shoes. You see it was cold this morning. Really cold, and I dressed for it, granted, not fashionably, but I didn't factor in the possibility of the sun coming out in the afternoon. And it did, big time.
I had a problem with my pants right off the bat. The tie string kept on getting loose, and I had to keep hiking them up every two minutes. At Home Depot I had to go off to a private corner behind a garden tractor and hike them up, and re-tie the string thing a number of times. When I got to Canadian Tire, I ducked between two plastic plants in the Home Decor section to pull them up. So, when I got to Zellers and was looking at clothes, they started to slide again. I was getting a little irritated by then and just kept on pulling them up discretely..mind you.
Later I was browsing in the garden centre, looking at all the neat patio tables etc. I spied a box with a picnic tent in it, and thought it looked interesting, and tried to take it off the shelf, not realizing it weighed 6,79 pounds. As I pulled on it ..it came down and pushed me backwards, but I caught it before it hit the floor. Well, I didn't really catch it, I sort of wore it because it fell on me. I didn't get hurt, I jumped up quickly, butttttt my pants didn't. This time the tie had come undone all the way...my pants were a loose cannon, there was nothing to hold them up. I grabbed them as fast as I could, fortunately nobody was in that isle, but just as I was tying them back up, I had to adjust my panties that had slide down a notch .. a man walked by me. A MAN. I know he saw me with my hands down my pants. I tried to get away as fast as I could, but he didn't really seem to care what I was doing in my pants, he just wanted to talk about the lousy way Zellers prices their product. We talked for almost 10 minutes and he never even looked at my pants. I guess he had other things on his mind.
It didn't end there...and I swear to you this is a true story..all of it.
I went into the dressing room and tried on some really cute clothes. I was so happy, because they all fit. I started to put everything back on their hangers to take back out, then put my black hoodie on, then put my shoes back on, and started out the door.
What do you think I forgot to put back on? YES, my pants! I had one foot out the door before I realized those fuckers were still sitting in a puddle on the floor. AHHHHH, they are so light it's like not wearing anything at all, and I guess I never missed them. After all they had been sitting half way down my hips the entire day!!
When I came home I threw them in the garbage. No more pyjama type pants for me.
Tomorrow is painting day. Good luck with that ey? I'm going to wear old lady elastic pants.
Slept in until 10:30.
Had a shower, made coffee.
The milk I poured in my coffee was "off"..had to use creamer....fucked up my morning.
Had lunch - uneventful. Watched an episode of "All My Children"...Told Erica to kiss my ass, and turned it off.
Went to home Depot to buy stain to paint my deck and new picnic table. AND to buy light bulbs!!
Someone help me out here, I know I don't get out that much, but WHAT IN THE HELL? You can't buy a light bulb anymore. All they had were these energy efficient screwy looking things. Plus some round creepy ugly ones. I bought a whole bunch of my favorite (pastel pink) 60 watt bulbs there sometime this winter....now they were ALL GONE. Where will I get my ambient light bulbs from. I hate nothing more than bright lights. I have dimmer switches in every room in the house. But the problem is with my 4,567 lamps I own. I'm a lamp junkie. And with the price of one of these energy efficient ass hole bulbs I will be out on the street driving my shopping cart full of carpet remnants...blubbering... hip dee dee da huh.
I was really pissed off. So, I went to Canadian Tire, surely they would have a regular light bulb, even if it wasn't a 60 watt Pastel Pink bulb. I found 4-60 watt regular bulbs wayyyyyyyyy down under a bunch of shit on the shelves. I think they were trying to hide them. This was really putting a dark cloud on my holiday I tell ya.
It was getting too late to do any painting, so I just kept on going. Finally I ended up at Zellers and started to look for some clothes.
I didn't have any plans to go clothing shopping today, because if I knew that, I would not have gone into a store dressed like I was. I was dressed to go hardware shopping...not for clothes.
I was wearing an over sized black hoodie sweatshit, blue very light weight sweatpants that have a tie string..not elastic at the waist (wait..that will tie in to another story) blue waffle weave socks and peacock blue lacy looking flat shoes. You see it was cold this morning. Really cold, and I dressed for it, granted, not fashionably, but I didn't factor in the possibility of the sun coming out in the afternoon. And it did, big time.
I had a problem with my pants right off the bat. The tie string kept on getting loose, and I had to keep hiking them up every two minutes. At Home Depot I had to go off to a private corner behind a garden tractor and hike them up, and re-tie the string thing a number of times. When I got to Canadian Tire, I ducked between two plastic plants in the Home Decor section to pull them up. So, when I got to Zellers and was looking at clothes, they started to slide again. I was getting a little irritated by then and just kept on pulling them up discretely..mind you.
Later I was browsing in the garden centre, looking at all the neat patio tables etc. I spied a box with a picnic tent in it, and thought it looked interesting, and tried to take it off the shelf, not realizing it weighed 6,79 pounds. As I pulled on it ..it came down and pushed me backwards, but I caught it before it hit the floor. Well, I didn't really catch it, I sort of wore it because it fell on me. I didn't get hurt, I jumped up quickly, butttttt my pants didn't. This time the tie had come undone all the way...my pants were a loose cannon, there was nothing to hold them up. I grabbed them as fast as I could, fortunately nobody was in that isle, but just as I was tying them back up, I had to adjust my panties that had slide down a notch .. a man walked by me. A MAN. I know he saw me with my hands down my pants. I tried to get away as fast as I could, but he didn't really seem to care what I was doing in my pants, he just wanted to talk about the lousy way Zellers prices their product. We talked for almost 10 minutes and he never even looked at my pants. I guess he had other things on his mind.
It didn't end there...and I swear to you this is a true story..all of it.
I went into the dressing room and tried on some really cute clothes. I was so happy, because they all fit. I started to put everything back on their hangers to take back out, then put my black hoodie on, then put my shoes back on, and started out the door.
What do you think I forgot to put back on? YES, my pants! I had one foot out the door before I realized those fuckers were still sitting in a puddle on the floor. AHHHHH, they are so light it's like not wearing anything at all, and I guess I never missed them. After all they had been sitting half way down my hips the entire day!!
When I came home I threw them in the garbage. No more pyjama type pants for me.
Tomorrow is painting day. Good luck with that ey? I'm going to wear old lady elastic pants.
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
CANADA DAY ...eve
I have tomorrow off...plus the entire week. I am so relaxed I'm almost falling off my chair. I HAVE 5 DAYS OFF. Tomorrow is July 1st. Canada Day, and I took the rest of the week off.
We are going to build my old fashioned picnic table tomorrow..like the one's you see in the parks. I love them.
I know for certain one of us will get hurt. We don't work well together, but I will try to hold my tongue if it means putting some duct tape over my mouth, because I NEED this table.
I'm looking forward to a great Canada Day. I even have some fireworks... plus a really nice supper planned. Just the two of us..and our Penny.
We are going to build my old fashioned picnic table tomorrow..like the one's you see in the parks. I love them.
I know for certain one of us will get hurt. We don't work well together, but I will try to hold my tongue if it means putting some duct tape over my mouth, because I NEED this table.
I'm looking forward to a great Canada Day. I even have some fireworks... plus a really nice supper planned. Just the two of us..and our Penny.
Sunday, June 28, 2009
Movie shoot at our little rental house
It was pretty cool. I don't really know if it's a movie or not. From the website it looks like an interactive ..."who done it." On the internet? I'm not sure.
Anyway, it was kinda thrilling to be out there at 10:00pm watching them shoot at night. Lighting was so important, I had to move my damn truck 5 times. It was too damn shiny.
The Director was very nice and showed us some the tricks they do to make it all seem real. The scene they were going for was a bunch of guys around a fire barrel. We actually have one there, but they brought there own, and it was lit by propane instead of REAL fire. Plus a biker chick was supposed to come up on them in the back lane and cause trouble. We watched them rehearse for about an hour, but then we got tired. I liked the biker chick. She was very cool. She was standing beside me waiting to rehearse while Gord was farting around with the lights behind our building (which is right beside the house)..it's one of those lights that come on automatically when it gets dark. Well, the light didn't work. So, Gord was knocking on the lens....I called over and said "you don't knock on lights" you turn them on, you knock on doors! Biker chick, gave me a HA HA shove, and I almost did a face plant in a puddle of water. She was very pretty and almost 6 feet tall dressed in leathers, so I didn't want to piss her off.
So, all in all it was very interesting. I had my camera with me, but for some reason I had "display" turned off...and I couldn't figure how to fix it in the dark, so I just pointed my camera and shot. And I caught most of it.
This little house on the prairie, might just one day be famous. But I don't think so.
The reason Gord let these guy do the "shoot" was because "Otto" the guy who owned the house before we bought it. We only bought it because we thought sometime down the road we would need it for parking etc. and bulldoze it down. Well, that never happened and we have been renting it out ever since. So, back to Otto. He was a character. He was a cab driver, and loved the movies. Every time a movie shoot came to town, he applied to be an extra. He rubbed shoulders with a lot of movie stars in his time. Winnipeg, has always been considered a great place to shoot, because we have so many historic buildings downtown.
Otto, died last year, so Gord thought it would only be fitting that they did a movie shoot in his old house. He would have been so pleased to have a movie being made in his backyard.
Anyway, it was kinda thrilling to be out there at 10:00pm watching them shoot at night. Lighting was so important, I had to move my damn truck 5 times. It was too damn shiny.
The Director was very nice and showed us some the tricks they do to make it all seem real. The scene they were going for was a bunch of guys around a fire barrel. We actually have one there, but they brought there own, and it was lit by propane instead of REAL fire. Plus a biker chick was supposed to come up on them in the back lane and cause trouble. We watched them rehearse for about an hour, but then we got tired. I liked the biker chick. She was very cool. She was standing beside me waiting to rehearse while Gord was farting around with the lights behind our building (which is right beside the house)..it's one of those lights that come on automatically when it gets dark. Well, the light didn't work. So, Gord was knocking on the lens....I called over and said "you don't knock on lights" you turn them on, you knock on doors! Biker chick, gave me a HA HA shove, and I almost did a face plant in a puddle of water. She was very pretty and almost 6 feet tall dressed in leathers, so I didn't want to piss her off.
So, all in all it was very interesting. I had my camera with me, but for some reason I had "display" turned off...and I couldn't figure how to fix it in the dark, so I just pointed my camera and shot. And I caught most of it.
This little house on the prairie, might just one day be famous. But I don't think so.
The reason Gord let these guy do the "shoot" was because "Otto" the guy who owned the house before we bought it. We only bought it because we thought sometime down the road we would need it for parking etc. and bulldoze it down. Well, that never happened and we have been renting it out ever since. So, back to Otto. He was a character. He was a cab driver, and loved the movies. Every time a movie shoot came to town, he applied to be an extra. He rubbed shoulders with a lot of movie stars in his time. Winnipeg, has always been considered a great place to shoot, because we have so many historic buildings downtown.
Otto, died last year, so Gord thought it would only be fitting that they did a movie shoot in his old house. He would have been so pleased to have a movie being made in his backyard.
Friday, June 26, 2009
I was going to do a balonie biker video
But it's too dark in my staging area. Thunderstorms have been moving in and out all day, and now there is just the darkness and rain. A very nice calm soothing rain. zzzzzz kind of rain.
I planned the video this afternoon, and wrote a script and everything. It's called Magic meets Fitness. Sounds a little strange I know, but that's the beauty of it. It's bizarre and the ending will freak you out. Everyone will be saying..."how in the hell did she do that?" Even I surprise myself sometimes. I have to figure a way to take the plastic shield thingie off Gord's helmet. I can't ask him, because he would throw a fit if he knew I touched his motorcycle crap. The camera can't pick up too much sound from behind the Hannabal Lecter Mask. Besides, it's a pain in the ass flipping it up to take a drink of wine.
He is such a baby when it comes to his stuff. The next time I do a video, I'm going to wear his leather jacket and his chaps. That would make for a good workout, because they are waaaay too big for me, but let's not dwell on that, let's just think about how all the wrestling around in all that heavy cow skin will improve my cardio workout. It's for a good cause. Then I will put them back neatly in the closet where he stores them, and spit on them. It seems fair, I had the workout and got back at him for being such a baby. I might even put on his revered leather gloves and touch some dog shit out on the back 40, then put them back ..very gently where I found them as well. heh justice will have been served.
I draw the line at wearing his boots. He has smaller feet than I do, and twice as wide. I have some pride! With all that leather I don't want to end up looking like a Clydesdale horse.
Anyway, I'm not going to wear all the shit for the video. Because this time it's all about the magic. Too bad it's so dark, because I'm in the mood to do it right now.
I've had enough fun at his expense. Sorry hon...(you bring the worst out in me:) And yes that goes two ways!
I planned the video this afternoon, and wrote a script and everything. It's called Magic meets Fitness. Sounds a little strange I know, but that's the beauty of it. It's bizarre and the ending will freak you out. Everyone will be saying..."how in the hell did she do that?" Even I surprise myself sometimes. I have to figure a way to take the plastic shield thingie off Gord's helmet. I can't ask him, because he would throw a fit if he knew I touched his motorcycle crap. The camera can't pick up too much sound from behind the Hannabal Lecter Mask. Besides, it's a pain in the ass flipping it up to take a drink of wine.
He is such a baby when it comes to his stuff. The next time I do a video, I'm going to wear his leather jacket and his chaps. That would make for a good workout, because they are waaaay too big for me, but let's not dwell on that, let's just think about how all the wrestling around in all that heavy cow skin will improve my cardio workout. It's for a good cause. Then I will put them back neatly in the closet where he stores them, and spit on them. It seems fair, I had the workout and got back at him for being such a baby. I might even put on his revered leather gloves and touch some dog shit out on the back 40, then put them back ..very gently where I found them as well. heh justice will have been served.
I draw the line at wearing his boots. He has smaller feet than I do, and twice as wide. I have some pride! With all that leather I don't want to end up looking like a Clydesdale horse.
Anyway, I'm not going to wear all the shit for the video. Because this time it's all about the magic. Too bad it's so dark, because I'm in the mood to do it right now.
I've had enough fun at his expense. Sorry hon...(you bring the worst out in me:) And yes that goes two ways!
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Let's add a little class to this blog
HA...I stole it from another blog, and I can't remember who to thank. But if you see it, let me know.I just remembered..
Thanks Dorie I owe you one.
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Okay...WHO SENT THIS TO ME?
And don't give me the...it wasn't me crybaby answer..whaaa whaaa whaaa, I know it's one of you!
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Just a quicky...
It was Hippy Chicks Birthday today, so we all went out for supper...and now I don't have any jam left. I know....I am really getting old fartish. But, it's a week day people!! I have to go to work tomorrow.
Happy Birthday old friend; you always continue to amaze me with your energy and wonderful spirit.
She asked us not to bring any presents, but only a "slip" of a perennial from our gardens, that she could plant in her garden on the farm in our honour. How cool is that?
I brought my favourite plant. It's a prairie grass that has huge tassels on it once it's full grown. I have been looking for this plant for years, and I found it about 3 weeks ago. I bought three of them but only had room for two, so I gave the other one to her. So, it wasn't really a "slip" from a plant I had in my garden, but it surely is my favourite plant. I hope when she see's those big tassels waving in the wind when it's full grown .... it will me be waving back at her.
Happy Birthday Janis!!
Happy Birthday old friend; you always continue to amaze me with your energy and wonderful spirit.
She asked us not to bring any presents, but only a "slip" of a perennial from our gardens, that she could plant in her garden on the farm in our honour. How cool is that?
I brought my favourite plant. It's a prairie grass that has huge tassels on it once it's full grown. I have been looking for this plant for years, and I found it about 3 weeks ago. I bought three of them but only had room for two, so I gave the other one to her. So, it wasn't really a "slip" from a plant I had in my garden, but it surely is my favourite plant. I hope when she see's those big tassels waving in the wind when it's full grown .... it will me be waving back at her.
Happy Birthday Janis!!
Sunday, June 21, 2009
I can't even describe
How tired I am.
Between work, housework, and my frigging back yard. I'm done. Done!
I know I bitched about our winters here. But you know?...It was good. Because summer just opens another door of more shit you have to do! Planting a whole bunch of flowers that will be dead in three months is not my idea of a good time. In my case, they will probably be dead tomorrow.
Today, I seriously reached my limit. Yesterday I had a shit pile of stuff to do in the house, it looked like a war zone in here. I didn't even have time to go grocery shopping. Today it was laundry, cleaning up the back 40, because our trees have decided to shed seed in copious amounts, plus branches seem to break off when a little bird sits on them.... or a tiny squirrel runs up a branch. Crack, crack crack...is all I hear all day. God forbid a small wind. Then it's pick up, pick up and pick up branches again. Mother nature, you piss me off. I think they are in menopause, they might need some calcium.
So I had to do the laundry, go to the store and get groceries, plant the rest of the stupid flowers, pick up sticks, and supervise Gord cleaning out the eaves. Remember me telling youse guys we had trees growing out of them!
Well, as usual I am such a worrybitch. When Gord put the ladder up to the house to clean the eaves I became his worst enemy. For some reason when he goes out to do stuff like this ... he puts on a pair of boots that must weight 55 pounds. He can hardly walk....nevermind climb a ladder, but he always wears those stupid boots! He climbs the ladder like the HULK, clunk, clunk, clunk, then slips down a rung, and corrects himself.........oy. I stand on the side and yell up stuff like..be careful, ...and he yells back down...WHAT? I yell again, be careful, and all I can hear is 'Shuthehellup"...you are driving me crazy. ME? But, I don't stop there, I supervised the entire event from below. I know for a fact a few times when he was throwing down wet sloppy leaves they did not land on my head by accident.
Seriously, is summer worth all this crap? Well it was around 9:00 pm when we were sitting on the deck chatting. Penny had her own chair beside us and was a happy little dog. The frogs were croaking in the pond, the weather was warm, and it was just getting dark enough so we couldn't see our ugly back yard. We looked at each other and said ...ain't life grand, and the sky opened up ... and pissed all over our parade. So we took our sorry asses back in and I got on the internet and paid some bills, and he fell asleep in front of the TV. So much for that. It may as well be winter.
Between work, housework, and my frigging back yard. I'm done. Done!
I know I bitched about our winters here. But you know?...It was good. Because summer just opens another door of more shit you have to do! Planting a whole bunch of flowers that will be dead in three months is not my idea of a good time. In my case, they will probably be dead tomorrow.
Today, I seriously reached my limit. Yesterday I had a shit pile of stuff to do in the house, it looked like a war zone in here. I didn't even have time to go grocery shopping. Today it was laundry, cleaning up the back 40, because our trees have decided to shed seed in copious amounts, plus branches seem to break off when a little bird sits on them.... or a tiny squirrel runs up a branch. Crack, crack crack...is all I hear all day. God forbid a small wind. Then it's pick up, pick up and pick up branches again. Mother nature, you piss me off. I think they are in menopause, they might need some calcium.
So I had to do the laundry, go to the store and get groceries, plant the rest of the stupid flowers, pick up sticks, and supervise Gord cleaning out the eaves. Remember me telling youse guys we had trees growing out of them!
Well, as usual I am such a worrybitch. When Gord put the ladder up to the house to clean the eaves I became his worst enemy. For some reason when he goes out to do stuff like this ... he puts on a pair of boots that must weight 55 pounds. He can hardly walk....nevermind climb a ladder, but he always wears those stupid boots! He climbs the ladder like the HULK, clunk, clunk, clunk, then slips down a rung, and corrects himself.........oy. I stand on the side and yell up stuff like..be careful, ...and he yells back down...WHAT? I yell again, be careful, and all I can hear is 'Shuthehellup"...you are driving me crazy. ME? But, I don't stop there, I supervised the entire event from below. I know for a fact a few times when he was throwing down wet sloppy leaves they did not land on my head by accident.
Seriously, is summer worth all this crap? Well it was around 9:00 pm when we were sitting on the deck chatting. Penny had her own chair beside us and was a happy little dog. The frogs were croaking in the pond, the weather was warm, and it was just getting dark enough so we couldn't see our ugly back yard. We looked at each other and said ...ain't life grand, and the sky opened up ... and pissed all over our parade. So we took our sorry asses back in and I got on the internet and paid some bills, and he fell asleep in front of the TV. So much for that. It may as well be winter.
Friday, June 19, 2009
I met Eddie on Thursday after 40 years
Lordie, he is a handsome dude. He still has all his hair and everything. Curly gray hair...and he is younger than me. Probably by 4 years and that would make him around 60 now. He was younger and a annoying dick just like my brother, always getting into my business. . So, I guess if you would ask my brother or anyone who pissed me off in those days, they would say, don't mess with her, she will make your life miserable. As older sisters do to their brothers and his stupid friends. This was just such a case. I was always fighting the brat pack...
Eddie wrote me this email in response to mine:
------------------------------------------------------------------
As far as your feet dangling out of a car window....I wish I remembered that. I am sorry though if I caused you any anguish. I really am. I remember you as a Gidget type of girl. Very prissy, always well behaved, well maintained and well dressed. I don't even remember you dating anybody. Maybe you weren't the angel I thought you were...ha! ha! I do remember you telling my dad that you had seen me smoking. When I got home, I opened the back screen door and met his back hand on my face. He warned my never to smoke again while he's puffing on one himself. Go figure. Does this make us even? or am I still in your bad books?
Have a great weekend and I'll try to stop in next week.
--------------------------------------------------------
Look what I did. This guy thought I was a goddess . That is the evil of the Facebook.
He thought I was Gidget? Yes I was Gidget. But not half as nice. I was always chasing after a moon doggie. James Darren...I still heart you.
Eddie was very nice, and a total gentleman. He is working on a job site close to my shop and stopped in on Thursday at my shop.
We had a great talk.. It was a little stilted at first, because what do you say to someone you haven't seen in 40 years?
You know what, would like tell more of the story, but my peepers are going to sleep. The story is just small talk, nothing more. What a nice guy. What good memories.
Yours truly
Gidget
Eddie wrote me this email in response to mine:
------------------------------------------------------------------
As far as your feet dangling out of a car window....I wish I remembered that. I am sorry though if I caused you any anguish. I really am. I remember you as a Gidget type of girl. Very prissy, always well behaved, well maintained and well dressed. I don't even remember you dating anybody. Maybe you weren't the angel I thought you were...ha! ha! I do remember you telling my dad that you had seen me smoking. When I got home, I opened the back screen door and met his back hand on my face. He warned my never to smoke again while he's puffing on one himself. Go figure. Does this make us even? or am I still in your bad books?
Have a great weekend and I'll try to stop in next week.
--------------------------------------------------------
Look what I did. This guy thought I was a goddess . That is the evil of the Facebook.
He thought I was Gidget? Yes I was Gidget. But not half as nice. I was always chasing after a moon doggie. James Darren...I still heart you.
Eddie was very nice, and a total gentleman. He is working on a job site close to my shop and stopped in on Thursday at my shop.
We had a great talk.. It was a little stilted at first, because what do you say to someone you haven't seen in 40 years?
You know what, would like tell more of the story, but my peepers are going to sleep. The story is just small talk, nothing more. What a nice guy. What good memories.
Yours truly
Gidget
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Holy "F" it's Wednesday already
The days turn into weeks, and the weeks turn into shit. And so she goes.
Remember Eddie, the guy from my hometown who found me on facebook?
Well apparently he wasn't the only ass hole. He reminded me of all the shit I did to him.
I guess I forgot that I did get him back, more than once. Yeah, I remember now. God I was an douce bag.
I'll get back to that tomorrow.
My pillow calleth.
Remember Eddie, the guy from my hometown who found me on facebook?
Well apparently he wasn't the only ass hole. He reminded me of all the shit I did to him.
I guess I forgot that I did get him back, more than once. Yeah, I remember now. God I was an douce bag.
I'll get back to that tomorrow.
My pillow calleth.
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Went to a birthday party
He had just turned 100 years old on Wednesday.
Amazing. I started this on Sunday night but was too tired to finish it.
I will post a few pictures later, I am sitting on the deck with my laptop for the first time since last September. It's just beautiful out here. A little messy because all the trees are shedding more little tree seeds for me to kill. It's never ending.
Gord's Uncle Albert turned 100, and we celebrated it in a small town in western Manitoba today. They had a huge turn out and he enjoyed every minute of it. Stories were told, some true, some were tinged with nostalgia more than the truth. I didn't grow up in the community Gord did, so even after being married so long, I am still a bit of an outsider looking in. I know they all ADORE me ...heh..yeah, but it's not like your own family.
I can't believe he still has so many aunt's and uncle's that are still alive...mine are all toast!
We had the best fancy sandwiches, egg, tuna and ham. I love those sammiches. Along with stacks of veggies, and fruit salads. It was like a bridal shower, only better, because the birthday cake was the bomb!! Three kinds. Carrot, Chocolate, and a green one I didn't sample. Just one cake could not hold the candles.
There was an incident.
Yesterday, I went out and bought a new pair of black sandals to wear to the party. They had a heel on them. Mistake number one. I'm used to wearing flat shoes...okay. Then I paired the new sandals up with some "cheaters"....you know those little foot nylons that only come to your knees. They looked really nice with my pants. But, once I slipped on my new Rockport sandals, with the soft slippery sole and leather uppercase... or whathehellever. I felt a little "rocky" when I wore them yesterday for a bit. I was barefoot, so there was no slip sliding going on. This morning, after putting on the cheaters...it was a slippery slope.
Anyway, we sat down at the table.. Gord, myself, his sister Sheila and brother Ron, and I was the last to get up to get some food. Don't you think my left foot snagged the leg of Sheila's chair (she was sitting right beside me)... I knew I was going for a fall...it was like in slow motion...and I was heading right for the "food table." Just before I did a face plant in the fruit salad, I managed to get my right leg stabilized, but my sandal flew off my foot and went spinning in front of my brother in law who watched it twirl around... as he was hanging on to his plate of food, and it finally come to a rest under the table. I had to get down on my hands and knees and get it from under the table...YOU CANNOT TAKE ME ANYWHERE. My ass was hanging out from under a large food table at a respectable Community Centre for the Elderly...
I was so embarrassed. I really was. Here I was doing all these gymnastic moves in front of everyone. Some old people clapped, I think they thought I was the entertainment!
It really was a nice afternoon, meeting so many generations of Gord's family that came to wish "Uncle" a Happy Birthday.
Uncle Albert is Gordon's Godfather. And until today he thought he was the only one. The speaker asked a gentleman to come up to the microphone who was Uncle's oldest God Child. I was watching Gord at the time, and I saw his eyebrows "lift"... and his expression was priceless, I could see he was surprised. So, after the new god child we never knew about did his congratulations to Uncle, I was still watching Gordon. (He was sitting down from me a bit with his brother)...because NOBODY WANTED TO SIT WITH THE WOMAN WHO THROWS A SHOE AT THE DINNER TABLE.
I knew Gord was going to get up and say something, and he did. Don't ever give that guy a microphone...oy...He told his 100 year old God Father how disappointed that he was not the "only God Child"...all in jest however. And went on to thank him for his success in life... Gord's parents were financially unable to help him to go to a Commercial College after high school to take a course in Appliance Repair. Uncle Albert gave him the tuition, and Gord passed his course with flying colours, and he never looked back. And with his first pay cheque after he got a job he started to pay back his uncle for the loan. In those days, I bet it was about 500.00 for tuition...but wages were lower then too. But Gord has been forever grateful, because this is what he has been doing all his life...along with our rental properties etc.
Then, another lady came up on the stage and said she was Uncle's God Daughter! Then many more started to congregate.................It seems Gord was over numbered at the end. He always thought Uncle was his only God Poppa.. Everyone had a great time with that. It wasn't supposed to be part of the program that was arranged, it just started to generate a life of it's own. And it was hilarious at the end....there were 5 of them! Most of them not aware of the other. Albert's son, who threw this party never expected this to happen, so they did a little photo shoot of all the God Kids. Gord is the one beside his beautiful cousin Janet on the left, and the guy beside him is the one we don't even know but for some reason they look like they are related...that started the frackis in the first place..then his cousins Orlean and Cora.
Happy Birthday Uncle Albert.
A funny story emerged later, when Gord's Auntie Hattie had the microphone. She was regaling all sorts of stories from the past, and Albert was just laughing. He hadn't really stood up to make a formal speech yet but after she spoke he asked his son for the microphone when she was finished.
Just a note..Hattie is his deceased wife sister... He said "Hattie" I remember when we had our son (they only had one) that you didn't like any names we chose for our boy....you were so scared we would call him Jake, or Abe or some dumb name...so we named him Elmer. Are you happy? HAAAAA I just about pissed my pants.
He is something else, and he only gave up his drivers licence last year at 99 years old.....and was a little pissed off because he had never ... ever had an accident. His son convinced him at the same time to move to an assisted living home, because he was still living in the house he and his wife had for 40 years. So, he has had to make a few changes this last year, but he seems to be taking it in stride. It's like his son said..."you just have to make sure it seems like it was his idea" and he will abide by it. Yet doesn't want to let go of his own power and choices. I can see that, because he still is very able to make them. He is sharp as a knife.
Gord's still pissed off....he thought he was SO SPECIAL! He will get over it..heh.
I was so embarrassed. I really was. Here I was doing all these gymnastic moves in front of everyone. Some old people clapped, I think they thought I was the entertainment!
It really was a nice afternoon, meeting so many generations of Gord's family that came to wish "Uncle" a Happy Birthday.
Uncle Albert is Gordon's Godfather. And until today he thought he was the only one. The speaker asked a gentleman to come up to the microphone who was Uncle's oldest God Child. I was watching Gord at the time, and I saw his eyebrows "lift"... and his expression was priceless, I could see he was surprised. So, after the new god child we never knew about did his congratulations to Uncle, I was still watching Gordon. (He was sitting down from me a bit with his brother)...because NOBODY WANTED TO SIT WITH THE WOMAN WHO THROWS A SHOE AT THE DINNER TABLE.
I knew Gord was going to get up and say something, and he did. Don't ever give that guy a microphone...oy...He told his 100 year old God Father how disappointed that he was not the "only God Child"...all in jest however. And went on to thank him for his success in life... Gord's parents were financially unable to help him to go to a Commercial College after high school to take a course in Appliance Repair. Uncle Albert gave him the tuition, and Gord passed his course with flying colours, and he never looked back. And with his first pay cheque after he got a job he started to pay back his uncle for the loan. In those days, I bet it was about 500.00 for tuition...but wages were lower then too. But Gord has been forever grateful, because this is what he has been doing all his life...along with our rental properties etc.
Then, another lady came up on the stage and said she was Uncle's God Daughter! Then many more started to congregate.................It seems Gord was over numbered at the end. He always thought Uncle was his only God Poppa.. Everyone had a great time with that. It wasn't supposed to be part of the program that was arranged, it just started to generate a life of it's own. And it was hilarious at the end....there were 5 of them! Most of them not aware of the other. Albert's son, who threw this party never expected this to happen, so they did a little photo shoot of all the God Kids. Gord is the one beside his beautiful cousin Janet on the left, and the guy beside him is the one we don't even know but for some reason they look like they are related...that started the frackis in the first place..then his cousins Orlean and Cora.
Happy Birthday Uncle Albert.A funny story emerged later, when Gord's Auntie Hattie had the microphone. She was regaling all sorts of stories from the past, and Albert was just laughing. He hadn't really stood up to make a formal speech yet but after she spoke he asked his son for the microphone when she was finished.
Just a note..Hattie is his deceased wife sister... He said "Hattie" I remember when we had our son (they only had one) that you didn't like any names we chose for our boy....you were so scared we would call him Jake, or Abe or some dumb name...so we named him Elmer. Are you happy? HAAAAA I just about pissed my pants.
He is something else, and he only gave up his drivers licence last year at 99 years old.....and was a little pissed off because he had never ... ever had an accident. His son convinced him at the same time to move to an assisted living home, because he was still living in the house he and his wife had for 40 years. So, he has had to make a few changes this last year, but he seems to be taking it in stride. It's like his son said..."you just have to make sure it seems like it was his idea" and he will abide by it. Yet doesn't want to let go of his own power and choices. I can see that, because he still is very able to make them. He is sharp as a knife.
Gord's still pissed off....he thought he was SO SPECIAL! He will get over it..heh.
Saturday, June 13, 2009
Trusted Treatment for Constipation for 100 Years
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Apparently I did not know how to spell Ex-lax in my last blog.
Shit.
Friday, June 12, 2009
The ants are back..........
Not as many as the first go round, but they are finding a way to get on my counter top.
I'm not happy.
I didn't have any of that organic crap left from the last time (and I wonder why there weren't dead?) So my blogger friend Donna said she used Windex to clean them up. I went after those little bastards with a vengeance....and ya'know...they don't like to shined up with Windex..nope. They run really fast. With the organic stuff, the stuck their tongues out at me, and said "see ya later alligator." And I did. Now that I have somewhat eradicated the Ants, I still have THE Uncles to contend with.
Every now and again, one come running across the kitchen counter top...and stops, and asks "have you seen my ant?" I said NO...AND WHACKED HIM. Unfortunately, he brought two friends with him that saw the hammer coming down and hid in the dishwasher, which was running about 8000 degrees at the time. Not a good place to hide. It was a sauna they did not expect.
Not to much happening over here... I'm constipated..Yes, me who usually spews shit all over the internet...cannot take a shit! It's totally screwed up my day...I think I will have Elax for supper.
If you don't see me again, I will have exploded. Life after 60 is tricky.
I'm not happy.
I didn't have any of that organic crap left from the last time (and I wonder why there weren't dead?) So my blogger friend Donna said she used Windex to clean them up. I went after those little bastards with a vengeance....and ya'know...they don't like to shined up with Windex..nope. They run really fast. With the organic stuff, the stuck their tongues out at me, and said "see ya later alligator." And I did. Now that I have somewhat eradicated the Ants, I still have THE Uncles to contend with.
Every now and again, one come running across the kitchen counter top...and stops, and asks "have you seen my ant?" I said NO...AND WHACKED HIM. Unfortunately, he brought two friends with him that saw the hammer coming down and hid in the dishwasher, which was running about 8000 degrees at the time. Not a good place to hide. It was a sauna they did not expect.
Not to much happening over here... I'm constipated..Yes, me who usually spews shit all over the internet...cannot take a shit! It's totally screwed up my day...I think I will have Elax for supper.
If you don't see me again, I will have exploded. Life after 60 is tricky.
Sunday, June 07, 2009
Almost too tired to type
I wrote this yesterday but fell asleep before my I could "Click" Publish
Finally I have been able to put in my annuals. We had frost warnings forever. If those suckers freeze tonight I will ... I guess do nothing...I can't. All that digging around in the dirt, and the planning of what goes in what pot, was making me tired. And a little mad. I don't like gardening, I'm sorry.
And all the getting up and getting down, climbing the stairs to the deck, up and down, running to the front of the house turning on the water, then turning it off, then turning it on again, then dragging the hose around..when I finally lost my cool. So, I took a break. Played with the dog, talked to the neighbour across the fence, and then Gord started pissing around the back 40.
As is his yearly ritual, he started every gas powered THING he owns. First the lawnmower, which was right beside me when I was potting my bedding plants. Nothing like gasoline fumes in your stinking face. He didn't start it up only once. Nope. It has an electric start on it which was not working properly. So, he kept on grinding away on it..over and over again. After about an hour he figured out you have to close the thingofamajig on the handle bar. It's funny how you forget to use a lawnmower after 9 months of winter. I don't blame him. But I laughed at him big time. So, in spite he let it run for 20 minutes, and damn near gassed me.
Then he went to the other shed and tried starting everything in there. One of them was a snowblower>>>> I thought winter was done with? We never use it, but he needed to know it was still working. Then our garden tractor (actually if was his dad's which we never use)...We have it advertised for sale in the "buy and sell"...and he wanted to make sure it worked. Well he lost the key to it. So, we go key seeking. he claims it is in our key container..which consists of a plastic bowl which sits on top of the closet by the front door. You know that door. My staging area for my videos..yeah that door.
Anyway, the key was missing. He couldn't start the tractor. A lot of swearing went on, and he couldn't believe he lost it. But later on he found a key that almost fit, and it started..OYYYY. So, after that he started up his motorcycle in the shed. And reved it and reved it, and reved it. Smiling all the while. Ignition and the smell of gasoline makes my man smile. It makes me MAD.
I had envisioned an nice quite afternoon in the backyard and do the potting of the plants. Plant potting needs a zen like atmosphere. After he had the whole back 40 filled with smoke and fumes from all the stuff he was starting up, I politely asked him to CUT IT OUT. That is like waving a red flag in front of bull. Just to piss me off he starting honking the horn on his motorcycle. How childish? Then I hit him on he head with a 2x4...the end.
WE HAVE TREES GROWING OUT OF OUR EAVES! And he is pissing around.
Bad picture taken through the screen. But tree are growing!
I have wanted an old fashioned picnic table for the longest time.. just your regular wood ole time picnic table. We had one until about 5 years ago, and it fell apart. So yesterday I went picnic table shopping because I seen a few on sale. They are prefab and all you gotta do is put them together.
I went to Home Depot on Saturday and asked for the one on sale. The lady said they were sold out, but I could go to the other side of the city to another location because they had 13 left according to their computer. Backupthetruckjake...I don't have time to go across town, I only have this small window of opportunity to pick it up. Because I have to get home, people are waiting for me, plus I have no idea HOW to get to the other location.
I asked if they could bring a table to this location, and I would have Gord pick it up on Sunday...but that was frowned upon. I called Gord on my cell and told him what had happened and asked him to go to the other location to pick one up if he had time. He didn't have time. I said, it's okay...let's just forget it. But not as quietly as is looks like on type.
So, I went to another place "Rona" right across the street, and asked them if they had picnic tables, and the nice man asked me..." Is someone in you household handy"?.... I heartily laughed in his face...probably getting a little spittle on his chin, and said "NO"...but my husband can fix anything that has a motor. He said they could give me a drawing of a picnic table and then we could buy the necessary lumber and build it ourselves.... I told him my husband is "wood challenged", so I left it at that. So, I went home dejected.
My SIL was over, and a few people before Gord got home and when he got home...he had my picnic table!! Yay!! He made the time to get it. He said he made some calls after I called him to find one closer to us...like Rona...where I had just been and dissed him. He probably talked to the same guy just after I left there. The guy is probably still laughing.
So, we still have to put it together, but not build it from scratch. I see divorce in my near future anyway. Or at the least, some really loud talking.
That would be a video you wouldn't want to miss.
But, I don't think the picnic table will fit in my small staging area.
Finally I have been able to put in my annuals. We had frost warnings forever. If those suckers freeze tonight I will ... I guess do nothing...I can't. All that digging around in the dirt, and the planning of what goes in what pot, was making me tired. And a little mad. I don't like gardening, I'm sorry.
And all the getting up and getting down, climbing the stairs to the deck, up and down, running to the front of the house turning on the water, then turning it off, then turning it on again, then dragging the hose around..when I finally lost my cool. So, I took a break. Played with the dog, talked to the neighbour across the fence, and then Gord started pissing around the back 40.
As is his yearly ritual, he started every gas powered THING he owns. First the lawnmower, which was right beside me when I was potting my bedding plants. Nothing like gasoline fumes in your stinking face. He didn't start it up only once. Nope. It has an electric start on it which was not working properly. So, he kept on grinding away on it..over and over again. After about an hour he figured out you have to close the thingofamajig on the handle bar. It's funny how you forget to use a lawnmower after 9 months of winter. I don't blame him. But I laughed at him big time. So, in spite he let it run for 20 minutes, and damn near gassed me.
Then he went to the other shed and tried starting everything in there. One of them was a snowblower>>>> I thought winter was done with? We never use it, but he needed to know it was still working. Then our garden tractor (actually if was his dad's which we never use)...We have it advertised for sale in the "buy and sell"...and he wanted to make sure it worked. Well he lost the key to it. So, we go key seeking. he claims it is in our key container..which consists of a plastic bowl which sits on top of the closet by the front door. You know that door. My staging area for my videos..yeah that door.
Anyway, the key was missing. He couldn't start the tractor. A lot of swearing went on, and he couldn't believe he lost it. But later on he found a key that almost fit, and it started..OYYYY. So, after that he started up his motorcycle in the shed. And reved it and reved it, and reved it. Smiling all the while. Ignition and the smell of gasoline makes my man smile. It makes me MAD.
I had envisioned an nice quite afternoon in the backyard and do the potting of the plants. Plant potting needs a zen like atmosphere. After he had the whole back 40 filled with smoke and fumes from all the stuff he was starting up, I politely asked him to CUT IT OUT. That is like waving a red flag in front of bull. Just to piss me off he starting honking the horn on his motorcycle. How childish? Then I hit him on he head with a 2x4...the end.
WE HAVE TREES GROWING OUT OF OUR EAVES! And he is pissing around.
Bad picture taken through the screen. But tree are growing!I have wanted an old fashioned picnic table for the longest time.. just your regular wood ole time picnic table. We had one until about 5 years ago, and it fell apart. So yesterday I went picnic table shopping because I seen a few on sale. They are prefab and all you gotta do is put them together.
I went to Home Depot on Saturday and asked for the one on sale. The lady said they were sold out, but I could go to the other side of the city to another location because they had 13 left according to their computer. Backupthetruckjake...I don't have time to go across town, I only have this small window of opportunity to pick it up. Because I have to get home, people are waiting for me, plus I have no idea HOW to get to the other location.
I asked if they could bring a table to this location, and I would have Gord pick it up on Sunday...but that was frowned upon. I called Gord on my cell and told him what had happened and asked him to go to the other location to pick one up if he had time. He didn't have time. I said, it's okay...let's just forget it. But not as quietly as is looks like on type.
So, I went to another place "Rona" right across the street, and asked them if they had picnic tables, and the nice man asked me..." Is someone in you household handy"?.... I heartily laughed in his face...probably getting a little spittle on his chin, and said "NO"...but my husband can fix anything that has a motor. He said they could give me a drawing of a picnic table and then we could buy the necessary lumber and build it ourselves.... I told him my husband is "wood challenged", so I left it at that. So, I went home dejected.
My SIL was over, and a few people before Gord got home and when he got home...he had my picnic table!! Yay!! He made the time to get it. He said he made some calls after I called him to find one closer to us...like Rona...where I had just been and dissed him. He probably talked to the same guy just after I left there. The guy is probably still laughing.
So, we still have to put it together, but not build it from scratch. I see divorce in my near future anyway. Or at the least, some really loud talking.
That would be a video you wouldn't want to miss.
But, I don't think the picnic table will fit in my small staging area.
Friday, June 05, 2009
Bad video..and ramblings
Be prepared for bad video ...as I am doing this all by myself. I think I have nice video of the floor most of the time.
Just to catch you up. I replied to Eddie last night, and I got the best response today. He is a really nice adult. I didn't kick his ass with my reply, because usually nobody remembers life the same way. We just exchanged formalities. Where we live, who we married, our parents, etc. I think we only remember what affected us at the time.
He was just probably being a freaky little kid, like my brother, always getting into my business. I remember when Gord and I went to his school reunion, a speaker remembered Gord as a bully and would always beat him up when he was delivering papers. The guy said in jest, but that is how HE remembered it. Gord almost fell off his chair. He couldn't remember it. I swear Gord kissed that guys ass the whole evening. He was so embarrassed. So, I'm thinking Eddy never meant any harm, it was ..just.the.way.it was.
It's funny how we don't let the old shit go. His one recollection of me was that I had a small dog that always wanted to bite him in the store....yes that was "Snowball" a Chihuahua I always carried in my arms wherever I went or had tucked in my jacket. My friend had to find a home for him and because I loved him so much anyway, she gave him to me. In a small town like Altona, no one had ever seen a Chihuahua so he always stood out where ever I went. And he didn't like boys. Except my dad. He was a yakking dog, only because the girl I got him had 4 brothers who always teased him. Poor little guy. Snowball was a wonderful little guy. When we were going out...Gord used to pick me up on his motorcycle, and I would put Snowball in my school jacket and tuck him up under the snaps just enough so he could stick his nose out...to enjoy the breeze. And away we would go. He loved it.
This is an oil painting a friend of my brothers did of him..
Okay the video has been downloaded. Forgive me. Seriously. The video says Gordon Martin..but that is me. My stuff is all messed up. I will fix it tomorrow.
Just to catch you up. I replied to Eddie last night, and I got the best response today. He is a really nice adult. I didn't kick his ass with my reply, because usually nobody remembers life the same way. We just exchanged formalities. Where we live, who we married, our parents, etc. I think we only remember what affected us at the time.
He was just probably being a freaky little kid, like my brother, always getting into my business. I remember when Gord and I went to his school reunion, a speaker remembered Gord as a bully and would always beat him up when he was delivering papers. The guy said in jest, but that is how HE remembered it. Gord almost fell off his chair. He couldn't remember it. I swear Gord kissed that guys ass the whole evening. He was so embarrassed. So, I'm thinking Eddy never meant any harm, it was ..just.the.way.it was.
It's funny how we don't let the old shit go. His one recollection of me was that I had a small dog that always wanted to bite him in the store....yes that was "Snowball" a Chihuahua I always carried in my arms wherever I went or had tucked in my jacket. My friend had to find a home for him and because I loved him so much anyway, she gave him to me. In a small town like Altona, no one had ever seen a Chihuahua so he always stood out where ever I went. And he didn't like boys. Except my dad. He was a yakking dog, only because the girl I got him had 4 brothers who always teased him. Poor little guy. Snowball was a wonderful little guy. When we were going out...Gord used to pick me up on his motorcycle, and I would put Snowball in my school jacket and tuck him up under the snaps just enough so he could stick his nose out...to enjoy the breeze. And away we would go. He loved it.
This is an oil painting a friend of my brothers did of him..
Okay the video has been downloaded. Forgive me. Seriously. The video says Gordon Martin..but that is me. My stuff is all messed up. I will fix it tomorrow.
Wednesday, June 03, 2009
Life's a funny bitch - Part 1
I was on facebook yesterday. And apparently I had made a few "mishtaken" und I let the whole world know about my comment to my niece for her birthday. I was duly corrected by the Ms. Special K. After figuring out what I had done wrong.. I started farting around in it and found a load of stuff I didn't even know was in there. Let's just say I have a love and hate relationship with facebook. And I go in every few days and look at my wall or whatever the heck it is, make a few comments and I'm gone.
I found a place where people were looking for me. No, it wasn't the cops.
A guy was asking if I was the Joan from "his hometown." My ears perked up. Yes, the name looked very familiar.
Anyway, I answered his message yesterday, and as it turns out, he is the little kid whose dad owned the grocery store on the top of our street in smallville Altona!
He asked me a whole bunch of questions today, and I still haven't answered because I'm in shock. What do I say....to him?
If I was truthful I would say:
Eddy, I'm still pissed off at you when leered at me and made fun of me when my mom sent me to the store to buy a box of Kotex. I know your parents were discreet, they always wrapped the boxes up in brown paper before they put it on the shelves....but we both knew what I was coming in for. I always tried to come into the store when you weren't working. I hate you.
Eddy, do you remember the time I had my first date with a guy? I was 14 years old, and he and I and another couple went out to Buff Creek to shoot gophers. (We didn't have TV in those days) we make our own drama. Butch was his name. Damn that makes me laugh...and we, and the other two went into town after that and grabbed a burger at the "Dairy Dell" .... and ... and... of course after that Butch headed for... my first trip to "lovers lane."
One mile out of town.
It was still daylight.
I still had never been kissed by a boy. I was kind of scared of him. He was all Jimmy Dean and stuff...tough, leather jacket...but yet he was driving his dad's station wagon. Even so I loved him.I w.a.s. 14.
Okay, this is how it went. We were all listening to music on the AM radio. Just grooving. Butch laid down on the drivers seat and put his head in my lap, and hung his legs out the driver side window. The couple in the back seat did the same thing. We were just talking and listening to the music. And yes, we smooched a little bit. Not much, because I found Butch's breath to be a little acidic. As a first kiss, this was not the best. By this time it was 8 o'clock I had to go home.
Eddy: The next day you spread the news all over town that I was doing bad things with with a guy on lovers lane, and he had his feet out the window and my panties hanging on the aerial of his station wagon.
Eddy: I was really embarrassed, but you wouldn't give up...you kept on telling everyone in town the story, you little pervert. What were you doing spying on me and my friends?
Eddy: Do you remember when your dad said I could work in the little store? I was thrilled, thrilled, thrilled. I worked for nothing. I just wanted to work in a store. I loved putting the loaves of bread on the board and packing them in brown paper and putting a string around them for customers to take home. I love making double decker ice cream cones, I loved the little store. It was the heart of our little community. Eddy, you always gave me grief. I loved your dad so much and would have done anything for him, yet anytime I wanted to work at the store your pushed me aside and made it rough for me. I finally gave it up. Eddy.
I will never forget the store. More on that tomorrow.
I will get back to him, once I get all this shit out of my system.
Eddy: The next day you spread the news all over town that I was doing bad things with with a guy on lovers lane, and he had his feet out the window and my panties hanging on the aerial of his station wagon.
Eddy: I was really embarrassed, but you wouldn't give up...you kept on telling everyone in town the story, you little pervert. What were you doing spying on me and my friends?
Eddy: Do you remember when your dad said I could work in the little store? I was thrilled, thrilled, thrilled. I worked for nothing. I just wanted to work in a store. I loved putting the loaves of bread on the board and packing them in brown paper and putting a string around them for customers to take home. I love making double decker ice cream cones, I loved the little store. It was the heart of our little community. Eddy, you always gave me grief. I loved your dad so much and would have done anything for him, yet anytime I wanted to work at the store your pushed me aside and made it rough for me. I finally gave it up. Eddy.
I will never forget the store. More on that tomorrow.
I will get back to him, once I get all this shit out of my system.
Monday, June 01, 2009
Monday......whatever
A face I love so much.
Father Duck keeping an eye out for his ducklings from the top of our neighbours roof. They have mated for the last twenty years at the house next door..with a pool. These may be the offsprings of the original ducks, but they always come back every spring.
My chokecherry tree is in full bloom. It smells so nice. But everything else is so far behind, because it's so stinking cold. Our yard looks like we are still in April. Nothing is growing the way it should. Farmers can't even put there crops in because it's too cold.When I went shopping for my Annuals on Saturday, I saw so many frost bitten plants in the greenhouses. They must have taken a big loss. I was going to keep them in our garage, but I have them nestled in between the the shed in the back and some in my little mini half assed wicker greenhouse set up. But the mornings are still close to freezing. We just had a wild thunderstorm pass through here about three hours ago. I was at work, and the skies went..black and the wind picked up big time... and I was really afraid all my stuff would be scattered around the back yard when I got home. But, the shed and the garage kept them out of harms way. Pheww.... that would have been costly.
Other than that...I have nuttin...except to say Happy Birthday to my ever lovin niece "Lisa"... and Gord's best buddy. Thanks for stopping in on Sunday kiddo!
This is her birthday drink of choice...and mine.
Sunday, May 31, 2009
I'm a gardening fool
I spent the major portion of the afternoon and evening hurting myself. Apparently, I have been walking on rugs, concrete, and icy walkwalks for 6 months. I forgot to switch to an uneven lawn with tree roots sticking up 9 inches. I did a face here, I did a face plant there, and everywhere I did a face plant!
At one point, I thought...as I face planted in a pile of dog shit, "why the hell bother getting up." This all there is. This is what life gives you after all these years. Laying in a pile of dog shit.
Part of it could be .. I'm walking like a bow legged cowboy. I spent the major portion of the day cleaning out my pond. I smell like pond scum...let me tell you. I'm rancid. Nothing smells like decay more than a whole bunch of leaves rotting in the bottom of a pond...nothing. Then I had to clean up whole garden. Oh my.
I am a office worker, an admistrative assistant if you must know, and I'm not used to bending down and picking stuff up, unless someone in the office drops some money on the floor. Other than that I don't do shit. And after 6 months of winter I am totally out of shape. Today however, there was so much shit to pick up and to dispose of, my " pick up" went to "park my ass."
I bought all my annual flowers yesterday. But it's still way to cold to plant them. I was working out in the garden with my fleece hoodie. It was cold.
I took a good look around the back 40 today, and am very disappointed. We have 5 trees that are dead. Two were dead last year, but you couldn't really see it because the other trees covered them up....but now it's time to get someone in and take them down.
My husband, ever the optimist( and cheap) said ..well I'll get out the chain saw (his father's.. probably made in 1945) and cut the trees down. ( I don't think it has a chain guard on it), and looks and sounds like a war machine. I think my Lutheran is still a "little more German" than I would like to think. Vat is next...after he gets a taste of the trees...the neighbours? Gott im Himmel!
At one point, I thought...as I face planted in a pile of dog shit, "why the hell bother getting up." This all there is. This is what life gives you after all these years. Laying in a pile of dog shit.
Part of it could be .. I'm walking like a bow legged cowboy. I spent the major portion of the day cleaning out my pond. I smell like pond scum...let me tell you. I'm rancid. Nothing smells like decay more than a whole bunch of leaves rotting in the bottom of a pond...nothing. Then I had to clean up whole garden. Oh my.
I am a office worker, an admistrative assistant if you must know, and I'm not used to bending down and picking stuff up, unless someone in the office drops some money on the floor. Other than that I don't do shit. And after 6 months of winter I am totally out of shape. Today however, there was so much shit to pick up and to dispose of, my " pick up" went to "park my ass."
I bought all my annual flowers yesterday. But it's still way to cold to plant them. I was working out in the garden with my fleece hoodie. It was cold.
I took a good look around the back 40 today, and am very disappointed. We have 5 trees that are dead. Two were dead last year, but you couldn't really see it because the other trees covered them up....but now it's time to get someone in and take them down.
My husband, ever the optimist( and cheap) said ..well I'll get out the chain saw (his father's.. probably made in 1945) and cut the trees down. ( I don't think it has a chain guard on it), and looks and sounds like a war machine. I think my Lutheran is still a "little more German" than I would like to think. Vat is next...after he gets a taste of the trees...the neighbours? Gott im Himmel!
Thursday, May 28, 2009
I'm getting soft
I'm starting to collect all this crap for my pond. If someone would have told me I would have this stuff around my house 20 years ago, I would have told them to take a pill. It's surprising how you begin to mellow over the years. I used to cut off teddy bear paws just to see little kids cry. My, I have come a long way. Do I hear clapping? Well, I didn't cut them off when they were looking...it was an accident. sort of.
Some wine was involved. But to my defense ...the very next day I sewed them back on.
So, can see I have come a long way.
Kid's used to drive me crazy in the old days.... I loved my nieces and nephews and at the same they.drove.me.crazy. They were so needy. awww yeah..they were little kids! I didn't see it that way, I guess because I never had any.... these little boogers were freaking loud. And they never quit TALKING! Get three of them in a room and it made your ears bleed. Then the fights..oy. It only got worse when they got older. But, I never gave up, I spent a lot of time with them when they were young. Especially the three I am talking about..on Gord's side of the family of course.
My own two nieces were angels. heh. Hi Lisa and Cheri!
I remember one time when I took out the "other three" camping with their mom's. I was hell bent on making sure these kids would behave on this trip (yes, we had gone on a few before this) ..I had set out chores for everyone to do. Little did I know, nobody listened to me. Meal time was a nightmare....I don't like this..I don't like that! Does it have onion in it? Does it have mushrooms in it, does it have FOOD in it? Ferfucksakes...kids, help me out here. The mom's scrambled around trying to pacify them. I sat a shook my head. WTF. Then the fighting. Yes, the kids did have a good time swimming and stuff, and some fishing, and back to fighting and trying to light the campsite on fire. Just kid stuff.
On the way home...we decided to stop in a little restaurant near the camp and have something to eat before we headed home. WRONG. Now this was just a little snack place where you could order chicken, burgers and fries. Every kid, could not agree to what was included in their order. And negations they made with the moms was nuts...I don't like that, I hate that. My brain was just about as fried as the chicken by the time we got out of there. And they had few melt downs to boot. Ahem, they were tired. Yeah, so was Auntie Joanie balonie...very tired.
Three days, three kids, and moms and me.....I was pissed!
They basically ran the whole show.
So, on the way home...I will never forget this. All three of them were in the back seat and I was driving. Two girls and one boy. Yes, that makes three. All around 7-9 years old. They started to fight with each other...again. There was all the..."kid's cut it out shit" happening, but they didn't...I guess BECAUSE THEY WERE TIRED... they weren't babies...they were being asshole kids.
So, I took matters into my own hands, because I "had it up to here" ... So I looked at both the mom's ..got there attention...because they couldn't or wouldn't stop the fighting..and said quietly that I would put an end to this.
I slammed on the brakes...that got their attention....and then I told all three of them to GET OUT. They didn't seem to know what I was saying...I said..you kids have ruined our vacation with your fighting and I want you to get out of my car NOW and walk home. Crying ensued. Promises were made to stop fighting.
It was a very peaceful trip back home after that.
Auntie Joanie balonie...needed some respect...and she got it.
Just a note: this was not a new tactic...my dad did that a lot of times when bro and I were fighting in the backseat of the car...that road looks lonely if you have to walk it.
Monday, May 25, 2009
No more ants in my pants
But I can't stop looking at the floor. Things still look like they are moving. But they are not, or maybe they are? NO! Those suckers freaked me out. It started on Saturday when I was washing the kitchen floor, and I took up the mat in front of the patio doors and a whole bunch of ants started to scurry around. I thought it was because I had the patio door open for the (queen) uh.. dog to come in and out as she pleased as she was airing out her tiara. So, I started to do a "happy dance" trying to step on as many as I could. I should have been wearing my "man" slippers because they are broader than the flip flops I was wearing and I would have killed them in a happy dance second. But as it was, I was doing the stomp. I thought I got them all.
So, I vacuumed under all the baseboards, the fridge and stove, my hair and everything I could put the nozzle to. Now in hindsight, I should have followed them to see how they were getting in .. and out of the house with all my furniture tucked in their teenie weenie little jaws. I saw one coming out from under the fridge with a mouth full of fridge lint. What on earth would they want with dirty old fridge lint? They didn't take the old wrinkled up frozen peas that had fallen under it...nor the small little Barbie purse one of the kids lost here at Christmas. They were after my lint. Bastards.
But theoretically, if I could have contained them to one specific area they would have made my spring cleaning much easier. Take 30,000 lint carrying ants and let them loose in your kitchen for a day. Then when it looks clean enough, herd them out, slap em on the thorax, high five em, and give them their immigration papers.
But instead I killed about 100 ants who may have just come to Canada on a special work permit visa. I know they looked like they were very hard working, and now I feel bad.
However I killed them humanely .. all I had in the house was that Safers Soap insecticide
Well that was sort of bad, not bad enough. One ant was sitting on my hair brush in the bathroom..yeah, there is a little hair lint in there, but before I tossed him in the sink and turned on the tap, I asked him if he had his water wings on...but before he could answer I set him adrift.
Let's not even talk about the the bumble bee the size of a "hub cap" that flew in while queen Penny was resting quietly on the deck...making sure I had the screen door open for her convenience. This was no ordinary bee, this was your spring BUMBLE BEE, who mean business.
I was still in the middle of Ant Stomping when this guy flew in. He/she was so loud I thought it was a buzz saw. Of course then I started to flail about doing the stomp/flail dance..until I saw him land on a small portion the the screen door that wasn't closed.
Bees are stupid. Normally I would go up to a bee and put a jar over top of them, catch and release them outside. This one had the hairs on the back of my neck standing up.......He kept on going up and down the full length of the screen door. Making a noise like a motor boat. He WAS mad. There is a little lip on the door...and if that stupid asshole would have just taken one of his bee paws and stepped out a little bit to the right, he would have been outside. I had to do an intervention... I got out the old jam jar and was going to trap him......he saw me...then he suddenly put out his furry little bee paw and climbed on the lip of the door and motored away. like it was his own idea...The last I seen of him was when he was trying to get pollen from all those phony flowers I have in my planters on the deck.
I closed the screen door after that, because that was what probably made him so pissed of to begin with. Nothing makes a bee madder than phony flowers. Then I made the Queen, and her Tiara come in, because someone was going to get hurt out there.
I managed to kill all the ants with the only big gun I had, and that was the Safer Soap I used for the plants last week. Who knew ants didn't like a good washing. I killed them organically. I feel so much better now. I must be the only person on earth that doesn't have a can of RAID around.
Now I have to get down on my old hands and knees and wash all that soap crap scum off of all my baseboards, walls, and windows.
But they are gonezo. Plus I put duct tape on the two cracks where they were coming in. It was a gateway. They found a place to get in from the deck into the patio door, then found a little teenie crack into the house from there, and came in through the baseboards. They had already established an olympic sized running track under the step of the patio door to the other side of it and went under the fridge and brought of fridge lint like it was cotton candy. We need more people ants in society...these guys figured this all out in one day!
I tried to post yesterday, but blogger was having a little PMS...or you Americans just came off your long weekend and tried to post...ALL AT THE SAME TIME. Shame on you. You bumped the Canucks! So quit waving your damn flags.
So, I vacuumed under all the baseboards, the fridge and stove, my hair and everything I could put the nozzle to. Now in hindsight, I should have followed them to see how they were getting in .. and out of the house with all my furniture tucked in their teenie weenie little jaws. I saw one coming out from under the fridge with a mouth full of fridge lint. What on earth would they want with dirty old fridge lint? They didn't take the old wrinkled up frozen peas that had fallen under it...nor the small little Barbie purse one of the kids lost here at Christmas. They were after my lint. Bastards.
But theoretically, if I could have contained them to one specific area they would have made my spring cleaning much easier. Take 30,000 lint carrying ants and let them loose in your kitchen for a day. Then when it looks clean enough, herd them out, slap em on the thorax, high five em, and give them their immigration papers.
But instead I killed about 100 ants who may have just come to Canada on a special work permit visa. I know they looked like they were very hard working, and now I feel bad.
However I killed them humanely .. all I had in the house was that Safers Soap insecticide
Well that was sort of bad, not bad enough. One ant was sitting on my hair brush in the bathroom..yeah, there is a little hair lint in there, but before I tossed him in the sink and turned on the tap, I asked him if he had his water wings on...but before he could answer I set him adrift.
Let's not even talk about the the bumble bee the size of a "hub cap" that flew in while queen Penny was resting quietly on the deck...making sure I had the screen door open for her convenience. This was no ordinary bee, this was your spring BUMBLE BEE, who mean business.
I was still in the middle of Ant Stomping when this guy flew in. He/she was so loud I thought it was a buzz saw. Of course then I started to flail about doing the stomp/flail dance..until I saw him land on a small portion the the screen door that wasn't closed.
Bees are stupid. Normally I would go up to a bee and put a jar over top of them, catch and release them outside. This one had the hairs on the back of my neck standing up.......He kept on going up and down the full length of the screen door. Making a noise like a motor boat. He WAS mad. There is a little lip on the door...and if that stupid asshole would have just taken one of his bee paws and stepped out a little bit to the right, he would have been outside. I had to do an intervention... I got out the old jam jar and was going to trap him......he saw me...then he suddenly put out his furry little bee paw and climbed on the lip of the door and motored away. like it was his own idea...The last I seen of him was when he was trying to get pollen from all those phony flowers I have in my planters on the deck.
I closed the screen door after that, because that was what probably made him so pissed of to begin with. Nothing makes a bee madder than phony flowers. Then I made the Queen, and her Tiara come in, because someone was going to get hurt out there.
I managed to kill all the ants with the only big gun I had, and that was the Safer Soap I used for the plants last week. Who knew ants didn't like a good washing. I killed them organically. I feel so much better now. I must be the only person on earth that doesn't have a can of RAID around.
Now I have to get down on my old hands and knees and wash all that soap crap scum off of all my baseboards, walls, and windows.
But they are gonezo. Plus I put duct tape on the two cracks where they were coming in. It was a gateway. They found a place to get in from the deck into the patio door, then found a little teenie crack into the house from there, and came in through the baseboards. They had already established an olympic sized running track under the step of the patio door to the other side of it and went under the fridge and brought of fridge lint like it was cotton candy. We need more people ants in society...these guys figured this all out in one day!
I tried to post yesterday, but blogger was having a little PMS...or you Americans just came off your long weekend and tried to post...ALL AT THE SAME TIME. Shame on you. You bumped the Canucks! So quit waving your damn flags.
Sunday, May 24, 2009
We now own a Ant Farm
This has been our first weekend of good weather since last October. I actually shed my hoodie. My second skin, my pacifier.
But, there was not too much to do in my little pond garden except clean up last years dried up foliage. The perennials are still only shooting out of the ground, so I didn't put in any extra annuals yet. For, tomorrow it could snow. I spent most of the day searching for all my pond people, and all the stuff I boxed up last fall for the garden. I put it all away in the sheds out back. Gord, apparently re-arranged everything. Between tripping over his motorcycle, garden tractor, and garden hoses, I managed to find a few things. But, I don't trust the weather just yet so we won't be turning on the outside taps just yet. The trees are not even in full leafage yet. Is that a word? I don't think so.
What I did do was buy another water feature for my garden...that makes three so far. Don't be surprised if I don't electrocute myself.
It's the one on the left...with all the fake flowers in it. I just put them in there to be able to visualize what real flowers look like. It's still too early around here. It's really cute. It will be going down to the garden once everything is warm enough. The fake pump is on top ..along with the the bowl filled with water that comes out the pump spout. The bottom is just a nice place to put some annuals in. The one beside it..again filled with fake flowers ...just so I could visualize it.. is three tiers of containers. This one and another I bought one will stay on the deck. I like that container, you can plant a whole bunch of different plants, some will be vines, others will be begonias, etc. Our deck if very shady so I have to stick to the shade lovers. It even has wheels on it. So I can move it around, if I want to. It will be very heavy once I get all the dirt in there. Thankyou to the wheel inventor.
I put Penny's ball in there, because the sound of the water dripping from that height made me want to pee. With the ball in there, it was a kinder and more gentle sound.
So, the yard is still a work in process, it's butt ugly, but give it a month and it should be in full bloom. Fuck I hate this place. You barely get out the summer stuff and you gotta stick it back in the shed for winter. And this was a winter from hell. Or? I'm getting older and tired of wasting 6 months a year of my life wearing a hoodie and a parka.
I used to laugh at people that went to Arizona for the winter (Snowbirds...we call them) retired folks who don't want to deal with this shit. Well, the last laugh is one me. But I will never trundle off to AZ and rent a condo and play scrabble with a bunch of senior citizens whose moles are getting larger by the minute as they sit in the sun. I would rather go to British Colombia and get the best of both worlds. Hardly any snow, a little rain, some sun...and the whole place smells like cedar. The last time I was in Vancouver, I could smell cedar everywhere, even in the parking lot of a 7-11. I would love to ditch this place and move to Vancouver...very very much.
That was my dad's dream too. He and Mom were going to retire in Kelowna BC. But, fiances didn't let that happen. My nephew lives there, he lives the dream. I envy him. It is the most beautiful place on earth....the mountains, the steams it's all there.
But, I am dreaming, I still have my own "fish to fry"...today I discovered ANTS in my house. Those little bastards should be ready for war because I'm ticked off. Last week I discovered little "hopper" looking bugs in my indoor plants. I can't kill them. Every time I water the plants they come hopping up out of the soil ...and I see them flying around. GET ME THE HELL OUT OF HERE. i no like bugs. I tried Safer soap..but these bugs are laughing at me! They are just in the soil not on the leaves...and then every once in while they come to visit us in the kitchen. Anyone got a solution?
I got a ham in the oven, and some scalloped potatoes brewing. Time to get it all together before the ANTS and GNATS get it!! AND TAKE OVER OUR WHOLE HOUSE.
Note: After supper we found where the ants were coming in. So I guess I can turn off my caps! Unless they are back tomorrow.
So.. bye
But, there was not too much to do in my little pond garden except clean up last years dried up foliage. The perennials are still only shooting out of the ground, so I didn't put in any extra annuals yet. For, tomorrow it could snow. I spent most of the day searching for all my pond people, and all the stuff I boxed up last fall for the garden. I put it all away in the sheds out back. Gord, apparently re-arranged everything. Between tripping over his motorcycle, garden tractor, and garden hoses, I managed to find a few things. But, I don't trust the weather just yet so we won't be turning on the outside taps just yet. The trees are not even in full leafage yet. Is that a word? I don't think so.
What I did do was buy another water feature for my garden...that makes three so far. Don't be surprised if I don't electrocute myself.
It's the one on the left...with all the fake flowers in it. I just put them in there to be able to visualize what real flowers look like. It's still too early around here. It's really cute. It will be going down to the garden once everything is warm enough. The fake pump is on top ..along with the the bowl filled with water that comes out the pump spout. The bottom is just a nice place to put some annuals in. The one beside it..again filled with fake flowers ...just so I could visualize it.. is three tiers of containers. This one and another I bought one will stay on the deck. I like that container, you can plant a whole bunch of different plants, some will be vines, others will be begonias, etc. Our deck if very shady so I have to stick to the shade lovers. It even has wheels on it. So I can move it around, if I want to. It will be very heavy once I get all the dirt in there. Thankyou to the wheel inventor.
I put Penny's ball in there, because the sound of the water dripping from that height made me want to pee. With the ball in there, it was a kinder and more gentle sound.So, the yard is still a work in process, it's butt ugly, but give it a month and it should be in full bloom. Fuck I hate this place. You barely get out the summer stuff and you gotta stick it back in the shed for winter. And this was a winter from hell. Or? I'm getting older and tired of wasting 6 months a year of my life wearing a hoodie and a parka.
I used to laugh at people that went to Arizona for the winter (Snowbirds...we call them) retired folks who don't want to deal with this shit. Well, the last laugh is one me. But I will never trundle off to AZ and rent a condo and play scrabble with a bunch of senior citizens whose moles are getting larger by the minute as they sit in the sun. I would rather go to British Colombia and get the best of both worlds. Hardly any snow, a little rain, some sun...and the whole place smells like cedar. The last time I was in Vancouver, I could smell cedar everywhere, even in the parking lot of a 7-11. I would love to ditch this place and move to Vancouver...very very much.
That was my dad's dream too. He and Mom were going to retire in Kelowna BC. But, fiances didn't let that happen. My nephew lives there, he lives the dream. I envy him. It is the most beautiful place on earth....the mountains, the steams it's all there.
But, I am dreaming, I still have my own "fish to fry"...today I discovered ANTS in my house. Those little bastards should be ready for war because I'm ticked off. Last week I discovered little "hopper" looking bugs in my indoor plants. I can't kill them. Every time I water the plants they come hopping up out of the soil ...and I see them flying around. GET ME THE HELL OUT OF HERE. i no like bugs. I tried Safer soap..but these bugs are laughing at me! They are just in the soil not on the leaves...and then every once in while they come to visit us in the kitchen. Anyone got a solution?
I got a ham in the oven, and some scalloped potatoes brewing. Time to get it all together before the ANTS and GNATS get it!! AND TAKE OVER OUR WHOLE HOUSE.
Note: After supper we found where the ants were coming in. So I guess I can turn off my caps! Unless they are back tomorrow.
So.. bye
Friday, May 22, 2009
My Southern Belles Brenda, Sally and Donna
I sure had fun sparing with you yesterday... I'm so glad you can take a joke.
But while you were so busy y'alling, eating grits, and shining Master Ashley's boots, I was making time with Rhett.........and fiddle dee dee if you don't like it. He likes me best.
But while you were so busy y'alling, eating grits, and shining Master Ashley's boots, I was making time with Rhett.........and fiddle dee dee if you don't like it. He likes me best.
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Cop outs
Sally said...HAHAHAHA
Okay, a little bird told me: It was Donna~~bye bye~~I'm so glad I got here first~~~~:) 
Brenda said...It's about slippers isn't it? Or else I'm dumb as a brick as usual.
Donna said...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAaaaaaa...OMGOD!!! SALLY GIRL!!!!! SHAME ON YOU!! You're BOTH little TARTS!!HAhahahaa....God, I needed this!!! But it STILL WUDDEN ME!!!Hahaaaa.....nitwits!!!
xxoo
Donna said...PS-Brenda!!! IT WAS BRENDA!!!Hahaaaa
Joan said...That Sally, she was a wee bit quick to blame it on Donna ...and bolted out of here like some dog was biting her ass. She is still high on my suspect list.
Donna seemed innocent enough in her comments...I forgave her for calling me a nitwit....until she came back and blamed it on poor Brenda. Who thought we were talking about slippers!
Donna might be right...Brenda was probably trying to dupe me by letting me think she was dumb as a brick...yet on the other hand she was "playing dumb".. to throw me off the track.
I'm going to bed now, but don't think anyone of you are getting away with this. uh uh
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